The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

A place for Darkstarrising's G to PG-13 stories
User avatar
darkstarrising
100% Moonlightaholic
Posts: 11014
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 2:25 am

The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by darkstarrising »

Dearest Readers,

'The Crucible' is my (late) offering to the challenge to write a story using the starting sentence provided by another writer. Luxe de Luxe :hug: graciously allowed me to use one of her opening lines which had to do with the investigation of Dean Foster's death and it's impact on Beth.

This is a story of Beth's self-discovery about the lengths she would go to to protect the ones she loves and the sacrifices made in the name of love. By the time I had completed this story, I realized I had come full circle.

I hope you enjoy it.

The normal disclaimers apply. I don't own any of the characters and no copyright infringement is intended. The only recompense I receive is the joy of writing these stories.

The Crucible

It was only after Talbot asked her to investigate Dean Foster's death that Beth considered how alike she and Josef really were. Hearing of the paparazzo’s disappearance, and knowing the reason for it, she felt neither shock nor regret, only relief that a serious threat to Mick’s secret had been dealt with. With Talbot’s request to investigate Foster’s apparent murder, it had fallen to her to deal with yet another.

And so she had.

Our Father, who art in heaven……

A year ago, Beth knew nothing of Josef Kostan or his kind. Then, one moonlit night, a solitary man stepped out from the shadows, changing both their lives forever. A man with a secret, who’d killed one he loved to save the innocent child she once was, only to capture the heart of the impetuous woman she’d become. Until recently, she hadn’t fully appreciated the pain of his sacrifice so long ago, but now she did. If only he knew …..

Now, under the rays of the late morning sun, Beth sat silently surrounded by towering oaks and dying flowers, their cloying fragrance carried on a gentle breeze. Yet not even the sun’s warmth could thaw the chill in her heart, nor dispel the fear that her dark little secret might someday be revealed. If it were, then her bargain with Josef would have been for naught, her heart likely forfeit as well as her soul.

Adjusting her sunglasses, Beth recalled her first encounter with the head of the LA vampire community under what could only be described as bizarre circumstances. Summoned to the offices of Kostan Enterprises, she found herself impersonating an escort in the presence of the head of the corporation. At the time, Josef impressed her as a bit quirky, almost uncomfortable in her presence. What struck her though, was the easy relationship between a work-a-day private investigator and the youthful head of a multi-billion dollar corporation. In short, Josef Kostan was intriguing.

In a somewhat perverse way, she enjoyed Josef's discomfiture, as well as Mick’s. They may be vampires, but they were still men and their reaction to the innuendo of her sultry voice amused her. Josef had complimented her on her beauty and intelligence, polite attempts at breaking the ice, or so she thought. Eventually, she’d come to learn that Josef did nothing without purpose; in his own way, he was letting Mick know he approved of this human woman, at least to a point.

Over time, as she grew closer to Mick, she grew closer to Josef as well, recognizing their love for the younger vampire was not all they had in common. Through both men, Beth became aware of how tenuous the safety of the vampire community was, and just how easily any peaceful co-existence with their human brethren could be destroyed. Like several others of her kind, Beth swore to protect their secret, and in so doing, protect the man she loved.

While Beth appreciated the ever-present danger of exposure, she wondered whether Josef’s fears were influenced by human ignorance and prejudices of centuries past. In his mind, should vampires be discovered by those less tolerant, history would likely repeat itself, and their persecution would begin again. The lucky ones would be hunted down like rabid animals and slaughtered. Those less fortunate would be ‘studied’, a polite euphemism for the biological experimentation humans would perform on those they feared. It wasn’t until Dean Foster tried to blackmail her that she fully understood Josef’s fears and just how dangerous one man could be.

Foster had initially been an obnoxious pest, one best dealt with by being ignored, until his attempt at blackmail made him a threat to the entire vampire community. While Beth could likely explain away the photos he sent her, it was clear that Foster wouldn’t stop stalking Mick until he uncovered something damning that he could profit from. Left to his devices, the greedy paparazzo might stumble on something that would expose Mick for what he was, knowledge Foster would sell to the highest bidder. Then, Josef’s fears of discovery would be realized, with persecution sure to follow.

Her decision to enlist the elder vampire’s aid hadn’t been made easily, but more than anyone, Josef understood the danger and was best positioned to deal with it. The contract had been offered, the meddling photographer’s fate implied, then sealed by her silence. Human and vampire were bound together by their love for Mick, willing to do anything to protect him, even murder. While impressed at the step Beth had taken, Josef advised that she find another career if she were serious about consorting with a vampire and protecting their secrets. Coming from Josef, Beth knew it wasn’t a request.

Later that night, Beth made her final broadcast, then spent the evening with the man for whom she’d given up her job and just a bit of her soul. Little did she know as she savored her wine and Mick’s company, Dean Foster stood only yards away capturing the intimate exchanges of two who would soon be lovers. How horrified she would have been had she known that moments later, Foster would breathe his bloodied last.

With Forster’s disappearance, the threat to Mick and the community was neutralized, or so Beth thought. Josef, ever circumspect, never acknowledged his role in the matter, honoring his promise to keep their little secret safe from all, including Mick.

Forgive us our trespasses..

Weeks later, now a civilian investigator, Beth found herself in Ben Talbot’s office. Before she’d started working for him, she’d found the new ADA abrasive, ambitious and arrogant, trusting few and clearly disdainful of Mick. Like Josef, however, he was quick to appreciate Beth’s intelligence and skill, ultimately offering her a job. It wasn’t long before Ben’s respect for her grew along with his trust. After Jacob Fordham’s recovery, he was even beginning to respect Mick. When the Monaghans disappeared, however, Talbot once again became reticent. As he closed the door to his office, there was something in the ADA’s manner that put Beth a little on edge.

‘Remember that paparazzo that was hounding Tierney Taylor and St. John? It seems he didn’t leave town after all.’

Without missing a beat, she’d asked ‘Who’s he harassing now?’

‘No one. His body, what’s left of it, was found tangled in some debris in the LA River. Not a pretty sight.’

Beth had felt her blood run cold, shocked not at Foster’s death, but that someone working under Josef’s direction hadn’t properly disposed of the body. ‘How did he die?’

‘Good question. The remains were mostly skeletal, with no obvious signs of trauma. Spending all that time in the water didn’t help matters either. ID was made by dental records.’

Beth blanched as images of the late Dean Foster were placed before her. It was one thing to know that she was responsible for his death, another to see the lurid results of her bargain with Josef. ‘Could he have been killed during a mugging? His camera equipment must be worth some serious money.’

‘Great minds think alike. No wallet or other valuables were found with the body, which does point to robbery. If we’re really lucky, the camera will show up in a local pawn shop. If the memory card is still intact, the last images Foster took might lead us to his killer.’

Knowing Foster’s obsession with Mick, Beth feared that whatever was on that memory card could be dangerous. ‘What do you want me to do?’

‘Check with the local pawn shops. See if expensive camera equipment like Foster's was hocked in the last couple of weeks. Somehow, I have a feeling that Foster didn’t go quietly into the night without leaving some clue to his killer.’


Beth had spent the next several hours dutifully looking for equipment she’d likely not find. Whoever Josef had tasked to dispatch Foster couldn’t possibly be stupid enough to pawn the equipment. Then again, how could Josef employ someone so sloppy in the first place? She thought of approaching the elder vampire, but something held her back. Talbot seemed to be watching her more closely than ever before and talking with her less. For whatever reason, the ADA seemed suspicious of her.

When she reported the negative results of her search, she wondered what avenue Ben would pursue next. It didn’t take long to find out.

‘You know, maybe robbery wasn’t the motive here. Maybe someone took exception to all the attention Foster was giving them. Any idea who that might be?’

Beth found the lies coming easily now to her tongue. ‘No, Foster seemed fixated on Tierney even after she died. If he’d transferred his ‘attention’ to someone else, I’m not aware of it. Maybe one of Tierney’s fans took their grief out on Foster knowing how hellish he made her life.’

‘Or maybe her boyfriend did. He’s a person of interest, even though he doesn’t strike me as the violent type. No, whoever took Foster out had to have motive, means and the balls to do so.’

‘That could be any number of people. You yourself said Foster harassed some so badly that they left the country.’

‘True, but I’m thinking somebody a little closer to home. Someone like St. John, maybe? Foster made his life hell for a while. St. John’s a broody bastard, probably with a real short fuse. Just how well do you know him anyway?’

‘Well enough to know Mick would never kill someone for being an asshole.’

‘But he’d kill given a better motive? Maybe blackmail?’

Beth felt her gut clench, as Talbot’s gaze bore into her. The ADA knew something, but what?

She’d stared right back. ‘What could he possibly blackmail Mick about? He wasn’t Tierney’s boyfriend, only her bodyguard trying to protect her.’

Talbot snorted. ‘Great job he did of that.’

Beth exploded. ‘Look, I can’t help that you don’t like Mick. But just because you don’t like someone doesn’t make him a murder suspect.’

Talbot’s eyes glittered dangerously, yet his voice was soft. ‘Who said anything about murder? I figured maybe Foster was on the losing end of an argument that got out of hand. God knows the guy was obnoxious enough to piss almost anybody off. Murder means somebody planned to take him out. I’m sure you don’t know anybody that would do that.’


That’s when she knew Talbot had something on Mick, and perhaps even on her. She needed to find out just what that was or the spotlight would once more shift to the man she loved more than life itself.

When she informed him of Talbot’s suspicions, Mick seemed more worried about her than anything else.

‘Hey. Why are you so upset? All Talbot’s got is skeleton that’s not telling him much of anything. Even if he finds the camera, what could be on it that would make Talbot suspicious of me? Worst I ever did was shove the guy. Trust me, Foster had as many enemies as Josef. Any one of them could have killed him and probably did.’

At Josef’s name, Beth flinched, something not lost on the PI. ‘What?’

‘What if Talbot already has something? The way he was asking questions seemed like he was trying to goad me.’

‘Any idea what that might be?’

That’s when the lies came again, this time not so easily. If she told Mick about Foster’s blackmail attempts, it wouldn’t be long before he figured out what she had done. And that was something he could never know. But Talbot had used the word ‘blackmail’. Maybe Foster had sent Talbot the pictures as well. ‘N..no….but I’ll see what I can find out.’


Lead us not into temptation…..


The opportunity to find Talbot’s evidence presented itself one evening after a clearly upset ADA rushed out of the office. As others closed up shop and headed home, Beth took advantage of the situation and let herself into Ben’s office. She knew she couldn’t stay long without arousing suspicion, but she also knew whatever evidence he had wouldn’t be laying out in plain sight. Purposely dropping a file she’d brought with her, Beth crouched behind Ben’s desk, tugging at each desk drawer as she picked up the scattered papers. The second drawer yielded what she’d been looking for, a case file marked ‘Mick St. John’.

Flipping quickly through the file, her worst fears were confirmed; Foster had sent the images to Talbot. Even if the ADA didn’t understand what they were showing him, the paparazzo had effectively made Mick a person of interest in his death. But there was something else as well, a large black envelope, with an old fashioned wax seal. Peering around the desk to make sure no one was watching, Beth opened the envelope and scanned the names listed on several pieces of paper. Many were unknown to her, but those she recognized had one thing in common – they were all vampires.

Trembling with fear, Beth quickly replaced the folder and fled Talbot’s office, her mind swirling with questions. Who had betrayed the vampire community? Did Ben know that the people on that list were vampires? Is that why he hated Mick so?

Regaining her composure, Beth made her way to her car and headed for the one person who could help her - Josef. When she entered his office, whatever snarky pleasantry he’d intended died on his lips. The fear gripping her was palpable and if she had come to him and not Mick, whatever had brought her here couldn’t possibly be good. Once Beth explained what she’d found, Josef cursed silently.

‘So, Mr. Foster was smarter than he looked. Sending those photos to Talbot was meant to keep Mick in line, but ended up making him a ‘person of interest’. Mick may have had nothing to do with Foster’s death, but that won’t matter to Talbot. He’ll dig until he finds something to incriminate Mick, only it won’t be what he expected.’

‘What do you mean, ‘may’ have had nothing to do with Foster’s death? Didn’t you have someone…’

‘No. By the time I set the hounds on Foster, he’d already disappeared. Besides, no one in my employ would have left any evidence behind. If they had, it would have been the last thing they did.’

‘So, who did kill Foster? Could it have been Mick?’

‘No. Don’t get me wrong, he’s more than capable, and in this case certainly had grounds, but Mick doesn’t do things halfway. If he’d killed Foster, no part of that scumbag would have been left to find. Just so you know, I’ve already put word on the street that I want to know who did.’

‘Josef, there’s more.’

She’d proceeded to tell him about the list in the black envelope, and about how some of the names on it had been crossed out. ‘All of the names I recognized I know are vampires. The ones that were crossed out, Pierce Anders, Donovan Shepherd, Emma and Jackson Monaghan, have all been destroyed. Your name is on the list, Josef, and so is Mick’s.’

Josef looked at her then, his eyes full of sorrow. ‘And so it begins again. The Legion has returned, an ancient enemy has once again thrown down the gauntlet. Going to the authorities with a list of our names is a declaration of war, one we might not be able to win this time.’

‘What will we do?’

A sad smile crossed the ancient vampire’s face as he touched her cheek. ‘ ‘We’, Buzzwire? While your loyalty pleases me more than I can tell you, if this is war, you can’t cast your lot with us. Humans known to shelter or give aid to our kind have suffered for their kindness. No, for your sake and for Mick’s, you must leave LA. What he’ll have to do, what we’ll all have to do, is something you can’t be a part of.’

Hearing those words again galvanized Beth. She’d let herself be shut out once before, but she wasn’t about to be shut out again. ‘This isn’t about loyalty, Josef, it’s about love. Mick is everything to me, and always will be. Human or vampire, there is no way that I’ll ever leave him. We have to find a way to stop Talbot.’


Deliver us from evil……


And so she had. When it came to protecting the one who had loved and guarded her all her life, Beth found that she was capable of almost anything.

It had been serendipitous, really. An urgent call from Talbot brought her to the courthouse, to discuss what he called a matter of life and death. When she caught up with him near the second floor courtrooms, the ADA was clearly agitated, almost frightened. Taking her by the arm, Talbot hustled her to the staircase.

‘Beth, listen to me. I don’t know how you got caught up in all this, but I can help you get out of it and into protective custody.’

‘What are you talking about?’

‘Kostan. St. John. They’re marked men, Beth, and I’ve got to get you away from them.’

Beth felt her heart hammering. Somehow, Talbot had discovered the truth. ‘Ben, listen to me. They’re good men, just different. Please, you’ve got to believe me.’

‘No, you don’t understand the danger! These men are evil and they’ll stop at nothing to fulfill their hateful agenda. I’ve got to get you out of LA before you get hurt!’


As Ben propelled Beth toward the stairs, an awkward stumble on her part caused the ADA to lose his own balance as he tried to steady her. In an instant, her need to protect the one she loved overcame any instinct to reach out and save the tumbling man. When his fall ended at the base of the stairs, a broken neck silenced any threat from Ben Talbot.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Yet it is only through death that we are born into eternal life.


“Beth?”

Mick’s soft voice and a gentle touch brought her back to the present. The graveside service was drawing to a close. Lost in her reverie, she’d heard little of the final words said to commemorate the life of a good and decent man. If she had heard them, they would have brought her to her knees.

“It’s time, Beth.”

Flanked by Mick and Josef, Beth rose to her feet, wondering if Ben knew she let him fall to his death. It didn’t matter. She knew, and the fact that he died trying to protect both Mick and herself would haunt her forever. At last she understood the guilt Mick felt when he killed Coraline to save her. How he bore that burden and still continued to live was something she would now have to learn herself.

The minister began the final benediction before the coffin was lowered into the cool embrace of mother earth. “Lord, look with favor upon your servant, Benjamin. In life, he sought justice for those who suffered wrongs, protecting the weak and the innocent from harm. In death, may he find eternal peace. Lord, grant that we, your children, learn from Benjamin’s example, letting love and justice guide us in all we do. Protect us from our enemies and deliver us from the hands of all that hate us.”

One by one, the mourners departed the gravesite, leaving Beth alone to grieve privately. Reluctantly leaving her, Mick and Josef made their way to the line of cars, each man feeling complicit in the death of Ben Talbot, but only one knowing the true tragedy of it. Leaning up against his car, Mick worried about the lone woman in black standing next to the casket.

“Beth’s taking Talbot’s death pretty hard. I keep telling her it was an accident, that she couldn’t have done anything to stop his fall. I wish I knew how to help her.”

Josef looked at his friend, fearing he knew why Beth felt as he did, a secret he wasn’t about to share. “She’s human, Mick. Death for her is still a reason to mourn. Knowing now that Talbot was trying to save her from the Legion and not us, has made the tragedy of his death even more profound. Will she recover and move on? Eventually, yes, but not today or even tomorrow. Give her time, my friend, when she’s ready to let you help, you’ll know.”

“I misjudged Talbot and I’m sorry for that. He might have been a hero, if he’d exposed us. Instead, he sent me the folder with Foster’s photos and the list. He had no way of knowing that he was being used by one of your enemies trying to topple you from power.”

Josef grimaced. “Brilliant strategy, when you think about it. Strike fear and paranoia into the heart of the community, thinking the Legion had returned. When I can’t find this phantom threat, my ‘leadership’ is called into question by said enemy and I get taken out. The king is dead, long live the king.”

“Yeah, but Talbot had no way of knowing there wasn’t any ‘Legion’. Beth said he thought they were ‘evil men’ with a ‘hateful agenda’. She thought he was talking about us. He tried to warn me of the danger, to give me a running start. He tried to protect Beth, something I’ll owe him for all eternity.”

“I know, and his sacrifice restores just a little of my faith in humanity.” Josef reached into his pocket and drew out a memory card. “For you, my friend, compliments of two well-intentioned, but sloppy acquaintances of yours. They took it upon themselves to take Foster out ‘in the name of vampire solidarity’. To think, one stupid, greedy paparazzo started all this.”

“What’s on the card? Anything incriminating?”

“Only about matters of the heart and it’s clear where Beth’s lies.”

“Then why’d she go to you and not me? I could have….”

“Yes, and that’s exactly why Beth came to me. Knowing you as she does, she was afraid you’d have drawn even more attention to yourself in trying to deal with Foster. She just asked me to ‘encourage’ him to leave you alone, pay him off. Fortunately for us, his fellow paparazzi took care of matters more permanently.”

As Beth slowly made her way toward the two vampires, Josef offered one final piece of advice. “Beth’s been through hell and back over the last few weeks, and what she’s seen and done has forever changed her. What she did by coming to me, she did out of love for you. She’s proven she’d do anything to protect you, to protect us. It’s time for you to man up, boyo, and let her know just how much you love her. She needs you now more than ever.”

His voice cracking, Mick acknowledged his friend’s request. “I know, and I will.”

When Beth arrived, the elder vampire gently kissed her forehead. “You’re a good woman, Beth, one I’m proud to call friend. Go home, get some rest and know I’ll never forget all you’ve done for us.”

Locking eyes with Josef, she saw a kindred spirit, knowing he understood her pain and the reason for it. “I did what I had to, Josef, though God knows a good man died for no reason. I wonder if he’ll ever forgive me. I know I’ll never forgive myself.”

Turning away, she sought the strong embrace of the man for whom she’d likely lost her soul. In his arms, she felt his love. In his arms, she hoped to find peace. Through his love, she might one day find redemption.
darkstarrising
Love – the universal language, the story of Moonlight
View My Fanfic Index

Image

Thanks to the talented and generous Phoenix for my beautiful banner!
Moonlightsonata
Rogue vampire
Posts: 1796
Joined: Wed Jan 21, 2009 5:43 am
Location: Outside Philadelphia Pa.

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by Moonlightsonata »

As always DSR a great story and an add on to a Moonlight episode. Thank you.
Image
Thank you Coco for the lovely banner.
User avatar
lynnrxgal
Fledgling
Posts: 411
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 8:47 pm
Location: Mick's Dispensary, Godfrey IL

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by lynnrxgal »

DSR, I cannot help but comment on this, a wonderful "what if" in the magical Moonlight world. After reading this challenge, I am missing this story more than ever! Here it is, almost two years after ML was wrenched from us, and I still am mesmerized by the characters and the "what ifs"...

Had Moonlight continued, you know that this whole story arc that started with Dean Foster's death would have been a major stumbling block in Mick and Beth's relationship, as well as their respective relationships with Josef. Sigh, it will never be on the screen, but thanks to the many talented people here, we still have it in "print".

Thank you so much for allowing me to revel again in a good ML tale!
Image
User avatar
allegrita
Moonlightaholic Admin
Posts: 46395
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 9:22 am
Location: Snuggled under the brown afghan, watching the fire

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by allegrita »

DSR, thank you for wonderfully tying up so many loose ends in the Moonlight story. Beth is so brave and so gallant; and if only she'd known more, she'd have been able to use that gallantry in a more positive way. This is a really poignant story, because she'll always have this shadow on her soul. She can relate to Mick's regret about having done "terrible things" now... how will this change her? How will it change their relationship? Will they ever share those secrets with each other?

Moonlight was about love and sacrifice, but also about secrets and the problems they cause. This story carries those themes perfectly... brava!
Image
User avatar
wollstonecraft61
Rogue vampire
Posts: 1865
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 7:58 pm
Location: Outside Atlanta, GA USA

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by wollstonecraft61 »

Dsr, I sat reading this story, my mouth hanging open from when Talbot died, on. Girl, have you ever thought about being a professional writer??? Seriously. You are THAT good. Beth let Talbot die, then found out it was for naught. Pure genius. I really thought you were going to broach the "Turning" subject here between Josef and Mick about Beth. This is pure gold, my friend.
Image
Image
Banner by the beautiful Alyssa Banner by the EXTREMELY talented eris
User avatar
fairytoes
Rogue vampire
Posts: 1443
Joined: Fri Jan 23, 2009 1:52 pm

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by fairytoes »

Fantastic. Stunning. Perfect. And so much more.
I'm not even able to form a proper sentence right now. This will go on my "read again and again" list.
Thank you for this wonderful story. :flowers: :flowers:
Image
Wonderful Banner by Redwinter
Gorgeous Avi by Lilly
Thank you!
jen
Cleaner
Posts: 6411
Joined: Mon Apr 20, 2009 12:11 am

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by jen »

Karen

Wow!

This is amazing. I need to read this again to absorb it fully.

stunning!

:hearts: :hearts: :hearts: :hearts: :hearts: :hearts:
Mick and Beth--two of the lovely faces of Moonlight
Image
Beautiful banner by the Fabulous Phoenix
User avatar
susieb
Logan's WoW nemesis
Posts: 534
Joined: Thu Mar 04, 2010 8:52 pm
Location: Right here feeding my inner vampire

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by susieb »

allegrita wrote:DSR, thank you for wonderfully tying up so many loose ends in the Moonlight story. Beth is so brave and so gallant; and if only she'd known more, she'd have been able to use that gallantry in a more positive way. This is a really poignant story, because she'll always have this shadow on her soul. She can relate to Mick's regret about having done "terrible things" now... how will this change her? How will it change their relationship? Will they ever share those secrets with each other?

Moonlight was about love and sacrifice, but also about secrets and the problems they cause. This story carries those themes perfectly... brava!
ITA :hearts:
Susie

Image
Sometimes the past doesn't catch up with you, it haunts you.
User avatar
Luxe de Luxe
Sire
Posts: 3285
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 2:50 pm

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by Luxe de Luxe »

OMG, dsr, this is awesome. I had the feeling reading this, that this was a Moonlight movie packaged into a few succinct paragraphs. This really contains so much. At its core, this story is a wonderfully complex tale of passion, guilt and the evil we do in the name of love.

I love your sub-headings, such a brillliant way to narrate the story and keep us on track while adding to the atmosphere of guilt that you evoke so well.

This is dark. Which I totally love. Here you show us a Beth who's actions in going to Josef about Foster have been taken to their logical conclusion. In the end, her hands are dirty not only from a distance, but directly, in her failure to extend a helping hand to Talbot as he fell. That she was mistaken about his intentions only serves to illuminate the extremity of her inaction even further. She is willing to, and does anything to protect Mick, but quite rightly, she pays a price. By the end of your story, she realises her similarity not only to Josef, in her willingness to protect the ones she loves, but her similarity to Mick. As a result of her actions she shares his most compelling experience, guilt, and wonders how he survives.
Turning away, she sought the strong embrace of the man for whom she’d likely lost her soul. In his arms, she felt his love. In his arms, she hoped to find peace. Through his love, she might one day find redemption.
Brilliant ending, dsr. You haven't let her off the hook for her misdeeds. She suffers and wonders whether one day, she might find a way to live with herself.

Thankyou for choosing my line. :hug:
Image
Banner by the talented Hot Micks
User avatar
wpgrace
100% Moonlightaholic
Posts: 16429
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 2:25 pm

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by wpgrace »

Oh! Dark Beth... cool!
Image
Banner by redwinter101. I miss you, Beloved.
Awesome avatar by the awesome, clever, and gracious Lilly.

If you read a lot of books you are considered well read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you're not considered well viewed. Lilly Tomlin

Grateful to Alex for Mick, Andy, and McG. :)
User avatar
francis
100% Moonlightaholic
Posts: 11556
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 9:45 am

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by francis »

A great take on how it could go after Sonata. A dark tale, filled with guilt and grief, but utterly fascinating how you incorporate the list, the Legion, Foster, the sloppy murder, Talbot and Beth's role in all of this. This explanation is very much down my alley, giving the Legion not more significance than being a ploy to get to Josef. And I always doubted if Josef would have given this task to the two teenage vampires, and I thought they did a sloppy job doing this in the backyard of a frequented restaurant, with lots of growling.
Beth will be changed forever, but maybe now she can understand Mick's traumatic experiences and the choices he had to make every day. She might be ready to become a vampire now. What I love the most about this story is that it shows that Beth has to get over quite a few things too, not only Mick, before she can move on. She has this arrogant attitude of a moral high-horse in Sonata, and that's something I don't think Mick would have put up with for long. Now things are in the open, and she's on even ground with him. She killed, too, for love and to protect someone.
User avatar
nutmegger911
Cleaner
Posts: 6236
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 10:36 pm
Location: Right here - right now

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by nutmegger911 »

Good Lord. That is beautiful, DSR. Sorry, just have impressions right now, no "critique."
NM911
Image
LIVE WIDE
It ain't canon until they've shot it (and aired it) - I said that.
Trust the Muse. - Catmoon
The system isn't broken, it's fixed. - Billo
User avatar
eris
Sire
Posts: 3501
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 12:21 am
Location: somewhere... I think

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by eris »

That was absolutely excellent. Period. No other word for it.

And you get bonus points for tacking the Beth& J are kindred spirits angle without this becoming a JoBe piece. Kindred spirits =/= soulmates, and here you show both with skill and attention to detail. In a century, when either Mick has either turned Beth, or she's yet again gone to the one man she knows will help her when he can't bring himself to do it, Talbot will be a fading memory. He might cause a twinge here and there if she sees someone who resembles him or hears someone call out "Ben" on the street, but he'll still be nothing more than a ghost. She'll learn to live with it because she still has means to live.
User avatar
darkstarrising
100% Moonlightaholic
Posts: 11014
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 2:25 am

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by darkstarrising »

Moonlightsonata wrote:As always DSR a great story and an add on to a Moonlight episode. Thank you.
Thanks, Moonlightsonata :hearts: , and I'm glad you enjoyed it!
lynnrxgal wrote:DSR, I cannot help but comment on this, a wonderful "what if" in the magical Moonlight world. After reading this challenge, I am missing this story more than ever! Here it is, almost two years after ML was wrenched from us, and I still am mesmerized by the characters and the "what ifs"...

Had Moonlight continued, you know that this whole story arc that started with Dean Foster's death would have been a major stumbling block in Mick and Beth's relationship, as well as their respective relationships with Josef. Sigh, it will never be on the screen, but thanks to the many talented people here, we still have it in "print".

Thank you so much for allowing me to revel again in a good ML tale!
thanks so much, lynnrxgal, :hearts: I also revel in the stories here and enjoy seeing how others interpret a missing moment or 'what ifs'. If they (the producers) were setting up ML to run for three seasons, the second one would have likely had Mick and Beth starting to grow closer, then have some major event or obstacle arise during the second season. You know that at some point Mick was going to find out about Beth's involvement in Foster's death....what would he have done? Would he have been angry with her or with Josef? God, but I'd love to know.
allegrita wrote:DSR, thank you for wonderfully tying up so many loose ends in the Moonlight story. Beth is so brave and so gallant; and if only she'd known more, she'd have been able to use that gallantry in a more positive way. This is a really poignant story, because she'll always have this shadow on her soul. She can relate to Mick's regret about having done "terrible things" now... how will this change her? How will it change their relationship? Will they ever share those secrets with each other?

Moonlight was about love and sacrifice, but also about secrets and the problems they cause. This story carries those themes perfectly... brava!
thanks, alle :hug: ITA about love and sacrifice and what havoc having secrets can wreak. I thought about having her save Talbot, then beat herself up over 'what she might have done' by letting him fall. Beth is a good soul, but she is impetuous. Josef has filled her head with all that can happen should the community be discovered, and she acted on those fears when she let Talbot fall. She'll do anything to protect Mick, but now she has to live with her actions. Will it change their relationship? I think it would have, but eventually whatever discord it might have caused would be overcome.
wollstonecraft61 wrote:Dsr, I sat reading this story, my mouth hanging open from when Talbot died, on. Girl, have you ever thought about being a professional writer??? Seriously. You are THAT good. Beth let Talbot die, then found out it was for naught. Pure genius. I really thought you were going to broach the "Turning" subject here between Josef and Mick about Beth. This is pure gold, my friend.
thanks, woll :smooch: Having a conversation about turning would have come eventually, but right now, Josef, knowing just how much it cost Beth to protect their secret, wants Mick to commit first to her, knowing how skittish he's been. If and when Mick commits, then Josef could work the turning aspect.

You're a sweetie about the writing. I've given it some serious thought and in my next lifetime (staring in about 8 months), I'm going to devote more time and energy into developing my skills. Maybe, just maybe, I'll give it a go.
fairytoes wrote:Fantastic. Stunning. Perfect. And so much more.
I'm not even able to form a proper sentence right now. This will go on my "read again and again" list.
Thank you for this wonderful story. :flowers: :flowers:
thanks, fairytoes :hug: and you're so very welcome!
jen wrote:Karen

Wow!

This is amazing. I need to read this again to absorb it fully.

stunning!

:hearts: :hearts: :hearts: :hearts: :hearts: :hearts:
thanks, jen :hearts: I'm glad you enjoyed it!!
susieb wrote:
allegrita wrote:DSR, thank you for wonderfully tying up so many loose ends in the Moonlight story. Beth is so brave and so gallant; and if only she'd known more, she'd have been able to use that gallantry in a more positive way. This is a really poignant story, because she'll always have this shadow on her soul. She can relate to Mick's regret about having done "terrible things" now... how will this change her? How will it change their relationship? Will they ever share those secrets with each other?

Moonlight was about love and sacrifice, but also about secrets and the problems they cause. This story carries those themes perfectly... brava!
ITA :hearts:
thanks, susieb :hearts: I'm glad you enjoyed it as well.
darkstarrising
Love – the universal language, the story of Moonlight
View My Fanfic Index

Image

Thanks to the talented and generous Phoenix for my beautiful banner!
User avatar
darkstarrising
100% Moonlightaholic
Posts: 11014
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 2:25 am

Re: The Crucible (PG 13) - First Line Challenge 114 5/2/10

Post by darkstarrising »

Luxe de Luxe wrote:OMG, dsr, this is awesome. I had the feeling reading this, that this was a Moonlight movie packaged into a few succinct paragraphs. This really contains so much. At its core, this story is a wonderfully complex tale of passion, guilt and the evil we do in the name of love.

I love your sub-headings, such a brillliant way to narrate the story and keep us on track while adding to the atmosphere of guilt that you evoke so well.

This is dark. Which I totally love. Here you show us a Beth who's actions in going to Josef about Foster have been taken to their logical conclusion. In the end, her hands are dirty not only from a distance, but directly, in her failure to extend a helping hand to Talbot as he fell. That she was mistaken about his intentions only serves to illuminate the extremity of her inaction even further. She is willing to, and does anything to protect Mick, but quite rightly, she pays a price. By the end of your story, she realises her similarity not only to Josef, in her willingness to protect the ones she loves, but her similarity to Mick. As a result of her actions she shares his most compelling experience, guilt, and wonders how he survives.
Turning away, she sought the strong embrace of the man for whom she’d likely lost her soul. In his arms, she felt his love. In his arms, she hoped to find peace. Through his love, she might one day find redemption.
Brilliant ending, dsr. You haven't let her off the hook for her misdeeds. She suffers and wonders whether one day, she might find a way to live with herself.

Thankyou for choosing my line. :hug:
Thank you, sweetie, for coming up with that wonderful opening line. :smooch: The sub-headings were meant to reflect Beth's guilt. She's sitting during the graveside service, wanting to be anywhere else on the planet but where she is. She's reflecting on just how she got to be sitting there, burying a good man who shouldn't have died. From time to time, though, bits of the prayers being said get past her mental barriers.

By the end of 'Click', we see Beth take a first, tenuous step on a dark path. She's made a request, and Josef will handle it. She'll never see the outcome of that bargain. When she does, the reality of her actions hit her and with another potential threat to Mick through Talbot, she wasn't going to take any chances. The tragedy of Talbot's unnecessary death will haunt her for a while, but as Josef said, she'll eventually accept it and move on, but not without being changed forever.
wpgrace wrote:Oh! Dark Beth... cool!
thanks, grace :hug: Haven't really done dark Beth before...
francis wrote:A great take on how it could go after Sonata. A dark tale, filled with guilt and grief, but utterly fascinating how you incorporate the list, the Legion, Foster, the sloppy murder, Talbot and Beth's role in all of this. This explanation is very much down my alley, giving the Legion not more significance than being a ploy to get to Josef. And I always doubted if Josef would have given this task to the two teenage vampires, and I thought they did a sloppy job doing this in the backyard of a frequented restaurant, with lots of growling.
Beth will be changed forever, but maybe now she can understand Mick's traumatic experiences and the choices he had to make every day. She might be ready to become a vampire now. What I love the most about this story is that it shows that Beth has to get over quite a few things too, not only Mick, before she can move on. She has this arrogant attitude of a moral high-horse in Sonata, and that's something I don't think Mick would have put up with for long. Now things are in the open, and she's on even ground with him. She killed, too, for love and to protect someone.
thanks, francis :hug: ITA about Josef not entrusting this task to two sloppy, and noisy vamps. One of the things that bugged me in the series was how some things were being set up in some of the later episodes for the second season - Foster's death and Beth's role in it in particular. I really hate loose ends. Another favorite was Beth asking Mick about whether he'd ever turned anyone before in 'Sonata', but they were interrupted before he could answer...yet his facial expression said it all....he did and that would have been a tremendous story.

Also agree that this experience allows her to 'walk a mile' in Mick's shoes. Knowing the danger to the vamp community, and the things done in the name of protecting their very experience will help her choose to stay human or be turned.
nutmegger911 wrote:Good Lord. That is beautiful, DSR. Sorry, just have impressions right now, no "critique."
thanks, nm911 :hearts: I'm very happy you liked it.
eris wrote:That was absolutely excellent. Period. No other word for it.

And you get bonus points for tacking the Beth& J are kindred spirits angle without this becoming a JoBe piece. Kindred spirits =/= soulmates, and here you show both with skill and attention to detail. In a century, when either Mick has either turned Beth, or she's yet again gone to the one man she knows will help her when he can't bring himself to do it, Talbot will be a fading memory. He might cause a twinge here and there if she sees someone who resembles him or hears someone call out "Ben" on the street, but he'll still be nothing more than a ghost. She'll learn to live with it because she still has means to live.
Wow and thanks, eris :hug: Josef knows that Beth will one day opt to be turned, and that he'll most likely do the honors....the relationship among Beth, Mick and Josef is a complex one, with Beth and Josef each loving Mick so very deeply. Yet I believe that Josef views Beth more as a friend / daughter, a good and worthy match for the man he loves above all others.
darkstarrising
Love – the universal language, the story of Moonlight
View My Fanfic Index

Image

Thanks to the talented and generous Phoenix for my beautiful banner!
Post Reply

Return to “Darkstarrising's Office”