Hunger - PG13 -- Champagne Challenge #125

[Lilly]

Thanks, Lucky.

You have so captured the dynamic, as I see it, anyway. The need on both sides, the hunger for sensation that drives the willingness of the freshie.

I think there are a number of reasons that women become (and remain) freshies, but the bottom line is that they have to get something out of it. For some it's the money, for others security, and for still others, it's the physical rush. I think there's a complex psychology at work here, and for this particular freshie there is satisfaction in not only the act, but in knowing the rush she gives him as well.

[susieb]

A new Lilly story! Definitely hot. Definitely sensual. Loved how you fleshed out a scene from the show - a character who had no speaking lines - and I absolutely could see it all. Loved every word, but this sentence haunts me:

I want my blood to flow through you both and bind us together like a ribbon of scarlet.

Makes a lovely painting in my head. Beautiful!

[Lilly]

Thank you so much, susie! I'm so glad that you enjoyed it.

[darkstarrising]

Wow! Not only was that an incredibly erotic take on a freshie's hunger, it was hypnotic as well.

Powerful creature, I watch your every move. Graceful, fluid, you pulse and flow like the life force you crave, and I feel your intensity from thirty feet away.

Her eyes are on Josef, watching, waiting for that moment when he grants her her fondest wish....

She relishes not only his touch, but the way he teases Mick with her. The fantasy that unfolds as she imagines Mick giving in was incredibly erotic:

You torment us both and you relish the game. Your fingers flare at my hips, but it's my own anticipation that holds me in this tantalizing trap. I want your mouths on me. I want you to take me -- together -- and stare into each other's souls when you do. I want my blood to flow through you both and bind us together like a ribbon of scarlet.

But this ending....she who provides sustenance is herself starving.

Beautiful creature, breathe me in and let me intoxicate you. Put your fangs in me and take what you want. Take my breath, my blood -- release these bonds. Make me feel alive. Do it now. Please.

Satisfy my hunger.

A humble plea - the next time that little voice speaks to you, let us all hear it.

[Lilly]

Thank you so much, dsr. I really appreciate your comments.

Wow! Not only was that an incredibly erotic take on a freshie's hunger, it was hypnotic as well.

I truly believe that the rhythm of a phrase can be just as important as the words themselves, and I was going for that in the sentence you quoted.

A humble plea - the next time that little voice speaks to you, let us all hear it.

I try, honestly, I do. It's just that, lately, I seem to be getting a little hard of hearing.

[RangerCM]

Mmmmmmmm. Very nice.

What a wonderful way to jump back into the Moonlight pool.

[allegrita]

The water's fiiiiiiine, isn't it?!

[Lilly]

Thank you so much for testing the waters with my little piece, Ranger.

It's nice to see you here.

[Moonlighter]

Wow, Lilly -- this was great! To not only give the Freshie in NSTAV a voice, but such a powerful one was tremendous. This line was my absolute favorite:

So I await your summons -- unbidden, unbitten, watching you prowl like a caged panther until you finish that interminable call.

I'm watching that exact scene in my head as I type this. You've captured it perfectly!

Nice POV, Lilly!

[Lilly]

Thank you, Moonlighter! I'm so glad you quoted that line -- it's one of my favorites.

[cassysj]

Such a sexy piece. It's been a long time since I read this one. She has been waiting and waiting to "serve" him. You always do such a wonderful job in visually setting a scene. I'm always impressed with someone who can do that. I need external dialogue to tell a story yet you've conveyed all the emotion and feelings with very few words. The description and her inner dialogue carry the whole thing.

[jen]

One of the charactertics of exceptional fanfic--or fic of any kind--is the way it takes your preconceptions and surprises us by turning them skillfully.

You delivered that here.

Initially, when you titled this 'Hunger' I thought that the topic to be explored was the vampire's hunger for blood. In the show Mick talked about it a lot, stressing that at some point it took control and he was powerless to resist. Here you touch on it briefly, like you would run you fingers lightly over an object in passing only to hone in on the freshie's hunger for the experience.

I must concur with an opinion I read upthread, that she is playing with fire. Perhaps she has already passed the event horizon and is falling into obsession.

Fabulous job!

Thank you.

Jenna

[Marigold]

This is fantastic, Lilly! Not only is this piece hot, erotic, and sensual, it also has an underlying animalistic feeling. Hunger, predator and prey, instinct, fangs, purring, etc. Very nicely done!

I really like how you gave this freshie a voice.

Thank you!

[Lilly]

Carol - Thank you so much for your lovely comment. The inner dialogue seemed like the only way to go with this character. I'm so glad it worked for you.

Jen - Thank you! There are different kinds of hunger and this time I opted for perhaps the less obvious route. In this case, this freshie is almost intoxicated by her desire. Whatever she gets from the experience of the bite, it must be almost like a drug. And she's craving it.

Marigold - Thanks so much for stopping by for a little bite. I truly appreciate your lovely comment/compliment and am delighted you liked "animalistic" feel.