Rated PG
A/N: I've been away from the fluff too long.
Thanks again to dear PNWgal. May she never run out of spit for the final polishing I always seem to need.


ETA: On second thought, maybe this should be PG.
Easy Does It
Hey, Mick. I thought I’d be hearing from you long before now. How are things going?
They’re… challenging.
What, you thought it was going to be easy? Blue sky and butterflies and all that? Figuratively speaking, of course.
Of course. Well, yeah, I did, kinda. I mean, we love each other. Beth wanted to be turned. It was all planned. It’s supposed to be easy.
Mmmhmm. So why are you calling me?
Remember that time you told me you had turned a lot of vamps in your day?
But no rugrats. Yeah, I remember.
So did any of them have any, um, unusual habits afterward?
Well, yeah, Mick. They all had a sudden craving for blood.
Don’t be a smartass. Other than that.
What kind of habits? I don’t know what you’re after! Stop fishing around for information and just tell me what’s wrong.
Beth wants to be naked.
She’s supposed to be naked in the freezer. That’s Vamp 101, Mick. If you didn’t know that you shouldn’t be turning anyone.
I know she’s supposed to be naked in the freezer, Josef! It’s OUT of the freezer I’m talking about! She wants to run around with no clothes on, ever.
And that’s a problem how?
Forget I called.
Now hold on there, Mick. C’mon, I’ll try to help. So she refuses to wear clothes at all?
Yeah.
What clothes are you trying to get her to wear?
Comfy stuff. Her weekend favorites – a white t-shirt and sweat pants.
T-shirt and sweats. Made from cotton, I suppose.
I guess so. Why does it matter? They’re soft. She always said that.
Beth the human thought they were soft and comfy. Beth the newbie vampire can’t stand them. The fabric is too harsh for her sensitive skin right now.
So what should I do?
Silk. Rich, luxurious, 100% silk.
Silk? That’s pretty impractical to wear all the time.
Mick, you’re an idiot. One, the silk just has to be next to her skin. It’s her torso that’s the most sensitive. Get a camisole and some panties – the boy shorts kind –that should help a lot. Then try the regular clothes over those. And two, it’s only for the first month or so. She’ll get used to regular clothes.
Silk lingerie under her clothes. It’s as easy at that?
As easy at that. Though letting her run around in a silk camisole and boy shorts sounds more fun.
I’ll keep that in mind. One thing though.
What’s that?
How am I going to get silk underwear for Beth when I can’t leave her alone to go buy some?
You ask me.
Hell no! Have you go out and buy silk panties for my Beth? I don’t think so.
Damn. Well, I could come newbie sit so you can go out shopping.
While she’s still running around naked? Forget it.
Double damn. Okay, then call Chantelle at Agent Provocateur on Rodeo Drive. She’s the personal shopper my exclusives use for all their lingerie and swimwear. Tell her you need silk lingerie for a brand new turn and what size you need. She’ll know exactly what to pick out and she can get it delivered within the hour. In fact, tell her to put it on my account. It can be Beth’s newbie shower present.
Thank you, Josef. That really will make it easy.
My pleasure.
Though she might be embarrassed if she learns you bought her underwear.
You’re forgetting she’s a vamp now, boyo. She’ll probably want to thank me personally by modeling it for me.
Over my undead body.
You’re such a spoilsport!
The End.