I'm Happy To Have Fangs PG-13 Cham Challenge 152
Posted: Thu Nov 14, 2013 4:41 pm
I do not own any recognizable characters no copyright infringement is intended.
Mick’s cell phone rang and he glanced at the Caller ID
“Hi Logan.”
“Mick, if this is a joke it’s not funny.”
“Logan, I just got up. What are you talking about?
“I received an invitation in the mail. It says you are cordially invited to Josef Kostan’s I’m Thankful I Have Fangs Party, commencing at ten p.m. November 28th in the year of our Lord Two Thousand and Thirteen. RSVP to 213-555-1599.
“Did you say this came in the mail? He never uses the mail. Mick grabbed his own pile of today’s mail and saw he received one too. Written in Josef’s unmistakable cursive.
“Logan, I got one too. Let me find out what’s going on. I’ll call you back.
Mick dialed the main number for the Kostan mansion. His freshie Tangie answered.
“Kostan residence.”
“Tangie it’s Mick St. John. Is Josef throwing a party?’
Tangie paused “He often entertains Mick.
“Tangie, I’m serious. I received this invitation in the mail for a Thanksgiving Day Party at the mansion. Is he…
Tangie gasped. “Mick, all of the girls are leaving by Wednesday the latest. Are you telling me he’s throwing a feast and isn’t satisfied with…….us
Mick groaned. He broke the cardinal rule. Never upset Josef’s freshies it gives him indigestion.
“Tangie, ummmm can you forget I called?
She sniffled, holding back tears. “No. I’ve already texted him your question. I’m sure he’ll give you all the details about a party I’m not worthy to serve at. Have a good evening.
“Wait….Tang… before he finished her name she was gone and Josef was calling. Even the ring tone sounded angry.
“Jozef…Hi.”
“Can you read English?” Josef growled.
“Yes.
“Do you know your numbers from one to nine?”
“Jozef…listen I’m
“Why didn’t you call the RSVP number? Why did you call my house? Tangie is beside herself.
“You couldn’t have even spoken to her yet. I literally hung up with her thirty seconds ago.
“Just because you can’t read Mick doesn’t mean I suffer from that disability. She sent me a text. MSJ wants details about your T-day party. T
“That doesn’t sound hysterical.” Mick said.
“Well, she is hysterical and when Tangie cries, the whole house cries. I’m coming home tonight to a house that is going to smell like salt and vomit.
“Vomit??’
“Pamela cries so hard she gets sick. That starts a chain reaction with Aquamarine and Delancy. I don’t even know what Jade is going to do. She just moved in last week. Last week Mick. The whole house is still getting used to the new baby and you do this to me.
“Jozef. What the hell is going on?
“I’m having a party and I had no intention of telling my staff.
“They would have heard about it when they came back into town.
“How?
“The freshies you hired would talk.”
“The freshies I’m flying in from Paris, Brussels and Monaco were going to talk?? Only one of my girls knows basic French. I don’t think she’s on the European boards.
“Why are you having a secret party? Is this some freshie punishment?
‘No. It’s a vampire punishment, thanks to you. My sire called two days ago. He said he was coming into town and wanted dinner so I invited him for the 28th.
“Your sire is coming for Thanksgiving?”
“I don’t think he knows its Thanksgiving. He hasn’t left the continent since 1725. When your sire comes you must prepare a feast and show your importance in the community. I'm not going to serve turkey and dressing. This is my family for heavens sake.
Mick started to understand. “Hence the invitations.’
“Exactly. He thinks it is ostentatious to use private couriers to deliver invitations and let’s not even discuss evites. So I was reduced to the U.S. Mail. I spent all day at work yesterday hand writing those invitations and walking them down to the mailbox so I could tell him I took care of it personally.
“Why is the date the year of our Lord?”
“My sire is a religious fanatic. John The Baptist sprinkled water on him so everything is about our Lord.
“Why did you want to keep the party a secret from your freshies?”
“Mick, my sire for all his religious fervor…steals freshies. He’s very unlikable and he would kidnap my entire household. I’d have to kill him to stop it and that’s so messy. It makes the girls upset when they see dead vampires on the floor.
“How often do your freshies see dead…..
“Mick, do I tell you how to handle your business? Josef snapped.
Mick laughed. “Actually every day you complain about my diet…my name, my….
Josef grumbled. ‘Mick. Are you coming to the party or not?”
“I wouldn’t miss it.”
“I’m glad. Since you’re going to pay for it.
“Now, wait a minute.”
“Don’t worry, I’m not going to charge you for catering. I am going to charge you for all the presents I’m going to have to lavish on the girls. Let’s see that’s ten freshies multiply that by spa days, jewelry, special events to elevate self esteem. I hope you weren’t planning on buying Beth anything expensive for Christmas.
Mick sighed. “Don’t your freshies obey their master’s voice?
“Always Mick. They obey orders but I can’t order away hurt feelings. I am not going to get a decent home cooked meal until this is settled. If I really want to be thankful I have fangs I have to get this resolved. Since you’re the one who did this to me by not following simple instructions.
“Okay, okay. I’m sorry.”
“Good. I’ll tell Tangie you’re a lunatic. You’ve finally gone insane from lack of real blood. My sire is throwing me a surprise party and you ruined the surprise.
“That’s your story?”
“Tangie won’t believe it but she’ll accept it and sell it to the other girls.
Mick’s cell phone rang and he glanced at the Caller ID
“Hi Logan.”
“Mick, if this is a joke it’s not funny.”
“Logan, I just got up. What are you talking about?
“I received an invitation in the mail. It says you are cordially invited to Josef Kostan’s I’m Thankful I Have Fangs Party, commencing at ten p.m. November 28th in the year of our Lord Two Thousand and Thirteen. RSVP to 213-555-1599.
“Did you say this came in the mail? He never uses the mail. Mick grabbed his own pile of today’s mail and saw he received one too. Written in Josef’s unmistakable cursive.
“Logan, I got one too. Let me find out what’s going on. I’ll call you back.
Mick dialed the main number for the Kostan mansion. His freshie Tangie answered.
“Kostan residence.”
“Tangie it’s Mick St. John. Is Josef throwing a party?’
Tangie paused “He often entertains Mick.
“Tangie, I’m serious. I received this invitation in the mail for a Thanksgiving Day Party at the mansion. Is he…
Tangie gasped. “Mick, all of the girls are leaving by Wednesday the latest. Are you telling me he’s throwing a feast and isn’t satisfied with…….us
Mick groaned. He broke the cardinal rule. Never upset Josef’s freshies it gives him indigestion.
“Tangie, ummmm can you forget I called?
She sniffled, holding back tears. “No. I’ve already texted him your question. I’m sure he’ll give you all the details about a party I’m not worthy to serve at. Have a good evening.
“Wait….Tang… before he finished her name she was gone and Josef was calling. Even the ring tone sounded angry.
“Jozef…Hi.”
“Can you read English?” Josef growled.
“Yes.
“Do you know your numbers from one to nine?”
“Jozef…listen I’m
“Why didn’t you call the RSVP number? Why did you call my house? Tangie is beside herself.
“You couldn’t have even spoken to her yet. I literally hung up with her thirty seconds ago.
“Just because you can’t read Mick doesn’t mean I suffer from that disability. She sent me a text. MSJ wants details about your T-day party. T
“That doesn’t sound hysterical.” Mick said.
“Well, she is hysterical and when Tangie cries, the whole house cries. I’m coming home tonight to a house that is going to smell like salt and vomit.
“Vomit??’
“Pamela cries so hard she gets sick. That starts a chain reaction with Aquamarine and Delancy. I don’t even know what Jade is going to do. She just moved in last week. Last week Mick. The whole house is still getting used to the new baby and you do this to me.
“Jozef. What the hell is going on?
“I’m having a party and I had no intention of telling my staff.
“They would have heard about it when they came back into town.
“How?
“The freshies you hired would talk.”
“The freshies I’m flying in from Paris, Brussels and Monaco were going to talk?? Only one of my girls knows basic French. I don’t think she’s on the European boards.
“Why are you having a secret party? Is this some freshie punishment?
‘No. It’s a vampire punishment, thanks to you. My sire called two days ago. He said he was coming into town and wanted dinner so I invited him for the 28th.
“Your sire is coming for Thanksgiving?”
“I don’t think he knows its Thanksgiving. He hasn’t left the continent since 1725. When your sire comes you must prepare a feast and show your importance in the community. I'm not going to serve turkey and dressing. This is my family for heavens sake.
Mick started to understand. “Hence the invitations.’
“Exactly. He thinks it is ostentatious to use private couriers to deliver invitations and let’s not even discuss evites. So I was reduced to the U.S. Mail. I spent all day at work yesterday hand writing those invitations and walking them down to the mailbox so I could tell him I took care of it personally.
“Why is the date the year of our Lord?”
“My sire is a religious fanatic. John The Baptist sprinkled water on him so everything is about our Lord.
“Why did you want to keep the party a secret from your freshies?”
“Mick, my sire for all his religious fervor…steals freshies. He’s very unlikable and he would kidnap my entire household. I’d have to kill him to stop it and that’s so messy. It makes the girls upset when they see dead vampires on the floor.
“How often do your freshies see dead…..
“Mick, do I tell you how to handle your business? Josef snapped.
Mick laughed. “Actually every day you complain about my diet…my name, my….
Josef grumbled. ‘Mick. Are you coming to the party or not?”
“I wouldn’t miss it.”
“I’m glad. Since you’re going to pay for it.
“Now, wait a minute.”
“Don’t worry, I’m not going to charge you for catering. I am going to charge you for all the presents I’m going to have to lavish on the girls. Let’s see that’s ten freshies multiply that by spa days, jewelry, special events to elevate self esteem. I hope you weren’t planning on buying Beth anything expensive for Christmas.
Mick sighed. “Don’t your freshies obey their master’s voice?
“Always Mick. They obey orders but I can’t order away hurt feelings. I am not going to get a decent home cooked meal until this is settled. If I really want to be thankful I have fangs I have to get this resolved. Since you’re the one who did this to me by not following simple instructions.
“Okay, okay. I’m sorry.”
“Good. I’ll tell Tangie you’re a lunatic. You’ve finally gone insane from lack of real blood. My sire is throwing me a surprise party and you ruined the surprise.
“That’s your story?”
“Tangie won’t believe it but she’ll accept it and sell it to the other girls.
Poor Tangie... 
and then blame it all on Mick.) 
What a mess! And of course it couldn't possibly be Josef's fault. It must be Mick's. He's going to be so in debt with all the gifts he has to buy Beth to top all the stuff he's getting for the Kostanistas...