June 1985 Coca-Cola Formula Forgiveness Series PG-13
Posted: Mon Aug 17, 2009 2:43 am
I do not own any recognizable characters no copyright infringement is intended. This story came out of my very dramatic reaction to the changing of the formula to New Coke.
June, 1985
"Charles, Mother is very upset." Sarah said
What about?
"The new taste of Coca-Cola."
"If she doesn’t like it she doesn’t have to drink it.
"Charles you know she enjoys a soda when we have drinks. She’s heartbroken."
"Sarah, you’re exaggerating.
"Wait and see.
Later that evening. Cocktail Hour
"Anne what can I get you?
"Nothing Charles.
"Nothing? That’s not sociable. I’m having Lisa flavored scotch. Sarah is having Terri flavored gin. What can I get you?"
"Nothing. If I can’t have my Coke I don’t want anything.
"Sarah mentioned you didn’t like the new flavor. Would you like Pepsi?
"I hate Pepsi!!! Anne snapped.
"All right. Lisa, get in here!
"Charles, I’m not drinking Lisa." Anne said in her most severe motherly tone.
"Lisa please name all the sodas you know."
Lisa was very confused. "Is this a game Charles?
No it's a question, I want answered immediately
Lisa rattled off "Coke, Pepsi, RC Cola, 7UP, Sprite, TAB, Fresca, Sunkist Orange, Dr. Pepper. Root Beer.
"Thank you Lisa. You can go. "That was quite a list Anne. What would you like?
"Nothing.
"All right how about some juice or fruit punch?
"No. Charles, I drink other things in the day. I just always enjoyed my Coca-Cola in the evening."
"What can I do for you?" Charles asked.
"Nothing Charles. They said the formula will never be used again. Anne sighed. "I’m not hungry. I’m going to bed.
"Do you see what I mean Charles? Sarah said "You have to get her some old Coke.
"Sarah I can buy up what’s available but it’s going to run out and we’ll be back to square one."
"What else can we do? Sarah asked.
"Well, I do own a significant amount of stock in the Coca-Cola organization."
"Do you really think you can do something Charles?
"I’ll go to Atlanta tomorrow.
The next evening.
"Sarah where is Charles?
"Out of town on business, Mother.
"When will he be back? He usually says goodbye."
"A day or two.. Let me get you something to drink.
"Sarah, I don’t want anything.
"Mother, the three of us used to enjoy cocktail hour. We talked about everything we did the day before. Let me get you an RC Cola.
"Sarah Whitley, you pour that drink and you’ll be standing up the rest of the night.
"Mother, I know you prefer Coke but why don’t you try…..
"You just don’t listen do you? I’m going upstairs.
"Mother, you have to have dinner.
"I’ll be down later for dinner."
"Mother you’re being ridiculous. This is stupid."
Anne was outraged. "Did you just call me stupid young lady? I’m still your mother. You will feel the back of my brush before bed tonight. If you don’t want a real spanking you will apologize to me right now.
"Yes ma’am. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.
Charles returned the next day.
Sarah was thrilled to see him.
"So were you able to do anything? She asked.
"I used reason and persuasion and plummeting sales figures.
"They knew that already. Did you use anything else?
"Yes, my fangs are very persuasive. Charles said. There will be an announcement."
"I can’t wait to tell Mother."
"Let her find out on the news.
"Charles! She has been so unhappy. Let her know you fixed it.
"Let her just think it happened." Charles insisted.
"Charles she reacquainted me with her brush last night. Sarah’s hand automatically touched her backside. " I want to cheer her up.
"What did you do to annoy her?
"I just offered her a drink and when she refused said I she was ridiculous and stupid.
Charles laughed. " Anne must be losing her touch, you were sitting when I walked in."
"It was only three swats but that silver really burns."
"Serves you right for being disrespectful.
"You sound just like her. Sarah said indignantly. "Charles you never should have given her that brush.
The next evening. Cocktail Hour
"Good evening Charles, Sarah. Anne said pleasantly.
"Hello Anne. How are you doing tonight? Charles asked.
"Just wonderful.
"Can I offer you any refreshment? Sarah asked carefully.
"Yes. I would like a 7UP please.
"Mother, that’s wonderful, you found something else you like.
"I found something else I can tolerate. But I heard on the news today Coca-Cola is coming back. The real formula should be on the shelves in a few weeks.
"That’s wonderful. Charles said.
"It must have been poor sales. Sarah suggested.
"I don’t care if vampires threatened to eat the CEO. " Anne said. "I’m just glad it’s fixed.
Charles always so calm and collected, choked on his scotch.
June, 1985
"Charles, Mother is very upset." Sarah said
What about?
"The new taste of Coca-Cola."
"If she doesn’t like it she doesn’t have to drink it.
"Charles you know she enjoys a soda when we have drinks. She’s heartbroken."
"Sarah, you’re exaggerating.
"Wait and see.
Later that evening. Cocktail Hour
"Anne what can I get you?
"Nothing Charles.
"Nothing? That’s not sociable. I’m having Lisa flavored scotch. Sarah is having Terri flavored gin. What can I get you?"
"Nothing. If I can’t have my Coke I don’t want anything.
"Sarah mentioned you didn’t like the new flavor. Would you like Pepsi?
"I hate Pepsi!!! Anne snapped.
"All right. Lisa, get in here!
"Charles, I’m not drinking Lisa." Anne said in her most severe motherly tone.
"Lisa please name all the sodas you know."
Lisa was very confused. "Is this a game Charles?
No it's a question, I want answered immediately
Lisa rattled off "Coke, Pepsi, RC Cola, 7UP, Sprite, TAB, Fresca, Sunkist Orange, Dr. Pepper. Root Beer.
"Thank you Lisa. You can go. "That was quite a list Anne. What would you like?
"Nothing.
"All right how about some juice or fruit punch?
"No. Charles, I drink other things in the day. I just always enjoyed my Coca-Cola in the evening."
"What can I do for you?" Charles asked.
"Nothing Charles. They said the formula will never be used again. Anne sighed. "I’m not hungry. I’m going to bed.
"Do you see what I mean Charles? Sarah said "You have to get her some old Coke.
"Sarah I can buy up what’s available but it’s going to run out and we’ll be back to square one."
"What else can we do? Sarah asked.
"Well, I do own a significant amount of stock in the Coca-Cola organization."
"Do you really think you can do something Charles?
"I’ll go to Atlanta tomorrow.
The next evening.
"Sarah where is Charles?
"Out of town on business, Mother.
"When will he be back? He usually says goodbye."
"A day or two.. Let me get you something to drink.
"Sarah, I don’t want anything.
"Mother, the three of us used to enjoy cocktail hour. We talked about everything we did the day before. Let me get you an RC Cola.
"Sarah Whitley, you pour that drink and you’ll be standing up the rest of the night.
"Mother, I know you prefer Coke but why don’t you try…..
"You just don’t listen do you? I’m going upstairs.
"Mother, you have to have dinner.
"I’ll be down later for dinner."
"Mother you’re being ridiculous. This is stupid."
Anne was outraged. "Did you just call me stupid young lady? I’m still your mother. You will feel the back of my brush before bed tonight. If you don’t want a real spanking you will apologize to me right now.
"Yes ma’am. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.
Charles returned the next day.
Sarah was thrilled to see him.
"So were you able to do anything? She asked.
"I used reason and persuasion and plummeting sales figures.
"They knew that already. Did you use anything else?
"Yes, my fangs are very persuasive. Charles said. There will be an announcement."
"I can’t wait to tell Mother."
"Let her find out on the news.
"Charles! She has been so unhappy. Let her know you fixed it.
"Let her just think it happened." Charles insisted.
"Charles she reacquainted me with her brush last night. Sarah’s hand automatically touched her backside. " I want to cheer her up.
"What did you do to annoy her?
"I just offered her a drink and when she refused said I she was ridiculous and stupid.
Charles laughed. " Anne must be losing her touch, you were sitting when I walked in."
"It was only three swats but that silver really burns."
"Serves you right for being disrespectful.
"You sound just like her. Sarah said indignantly. "Charles you never should have given her that brush.
The next evening. Cocktail Hour
"Good evening Charles, Sarah. Anne said pleasantly.
"Hello Anne. How are you doing tonight? Charles asked.
"Just wonderful.
"Can I offer you any refreshment? Sarah asked carefully.
"Yes. I would like a 7UP please.
"Mother, that’s wonderful, you found something else you like.
"I found something else I can tolerate. But I heard on the news today Coca-Cola is coming back. The real formula should be on the shelves in a few weeks.
"That’s wonderful. Charles said.
"It must have been poor sales. Sarah suggested.
"I don’t care if vampires threatened to eat the CEO. " Anne said. "I’m just glad it’s fixed.
Charles always so calm and collected, choked on his scotch.
I doubt it would taste any worse than "New" even after a few decades in a box.
I remember the fiasco that was "New" Coke! If I remember right - it was sweeter (not that Coke isn't sweet). I do remember it didn't do as well as a 'mixer' as the original did. My Dad did NOT like the New Coke with his Wild Turkey in the evenings....