Fight For Your Life (PG-13) (Dr. Feelgood 3)

[francis]

This is the POV of Dr. Pollock, the feral vampire, in his last minutes of life.

Disclaimer: Moonlight isn't mine, I just play with it. Just some short thoughts.


„I will go back to my old life.“
His face changed from fury to – what? pity? compassion? remorse? Then his look became steel.
„You can’t. You destroyed it.“
I was surprised how much it hurt when he shoved the wooden stake into my chest. And I wondered about the experience to live through that. Hell, wasn’t it enough already? Now I was killed the second time and it still didn’t catch.

He took me into a fireman’s grip, careful not to dislodge the damned stake, then laid me down on a gurney in the deserted top floor, where the biohazard stuff is kept. Ironic, that I should die here in the hospital that I had committed so many hours to. I knew he would kill me. Three time’s the charm.

I tried to keep alert, but it was hard. I was still extremely hungry, and it messed with my concentration. But now that I was incapacitated, my mind took over from the almost drunken rage within. It was almost like a respite. Maybe now I could sleep.

I heard him talk to a woman. They argued. He pulled a sheet over my face.
I suddenly knew where he was heading with me. If I could, I would have struggled. Part of me still wanted to live, damn it. I wanted to wake up in the morning, have breakfast, read the paper, drive to work, go home, tend to the garden, love my wife… wait.
She was dead.
I killed her.
I was in no way prepared for the flash of pain that ran through my no longer beating heart when I remembered that I killed my wife in a senseless rage of hunger. And then the dull pain at the recognition that I never could be trusted with patients again, that I wasn’t safe.

He was right. I destroyed it. There was no other way. I was totally out of control.
In his place, I would have done the same.
I heard his voice when he told her no. I knew when he shoved me into the incinerator with clumsy, angry movements. He would probably beat himself up about this.

I almost wished I could comfort him.
I anticipated pain, but I welcomed it.
Because I so wanted this to end.
Preferably now.
And then it did just that.

[sleo]

Wow. Just wow. Beautiful.

[mitzie]

Wow! That was so powerful and realistic. To hear his thoughts with so much regret and then wanting it to be over...Wow!!
Excellent story!!!! Bravo!!

mitzie

[francis]

Thank you, sleo and mitzie.

[mitzie]

Another re-read of this last part. How very, very sad for Dr. Pollock that this whole turning ever happened in the first place!! Very powerful story!!! It hit me like a freight train!!!!

mitzie

[allegrita]

Francis,
I absolutely believe that his last moments would have been like this. That he would have had a chance to realize what he'd done and to regret everything...and wish for the end to come.

But I'm very sorry for Mick that he had to be the guy to give him the oblivion he craved. Because for Mick, it was yet another failure, yet another loss. He wanted to save this guy. He wanted to believe that it was possible to redeem a person who was in his position, at the beginning of the experience of being a vampire. He was so close... and he failed.

Poor Jeffrey... he didn't deserve this fate. He's a wonderful parallel of Mick--a good guy who had a bad thing happen to him--and ruin his life.

[francis]

Thank you, mitzie, for rereading. What a compliment that you read it again.
Thank you, allegrita, for your kind review. Yes, Mick and Jeffrey are both in a bad place, and they are kindred souls.

[wpgrace]

OMG... wonderful. He's a doctor and had been a GOOD doctor... he had been a Good Samaritan and it cost him his life... but he goes out wanting to comfort Mick. Which makes him one of us, huh?

This was so good, francis. I can only say...

[francis]

Yeah, he's one of us, he feels Mick's pain. He was a good man. Just a bad actor.
Thank you!!!

[jen]

His acting was not as bad as those bad fake teeth. Why did they use so many special effects lthat looked so obviously phoney. There was a blend of the very, very good and the truly awful.

Upir writing though, is fabulous.

Thank you!

[francis]

You're right, the teeth were awful.
Pollock could have been okay, if only his sire had taken him for the first few hours. I guess they are a critical time, and in the confusion of transition you just need someone to hold on to. Poor guy.