Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

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francis
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Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

Post by francis »

Thank you to Harfang and crazy fluffy for helping me with the french poems. Thank you to RNB for being my beta.
Usual disclaimers still apply.

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link from chapter 26:
viewtopic.php?f=75&t=6404
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I thought to myself that I shouldn’t be reading this, but it wasn’t my fault she let it lie here. Some of it was French, most was in English. It wasn’t my fault I could understand French. We talked about our love for France. She’d never been open to me. Maybe her diary would give me answers. Why did women write diaries anyway?

I thumbed through the first pages. There were no dates. The handwriting was delicate, old-fashioned, certainly not the way US children learned to write. She’d told me she was old, but here I could see it.

I didn’t dare to read properly at first, just skimmed the text. There were a few poems on which my eyes came to rest.

les murs empilés
le pont-levis levé
les portes verouillées
maintenant je m'assois
avec envie et furie
dans mon cachot humide
et je n'ose pas
d'espérer
que quelqu'un
considére qu'il vaut la peine
de me conquérir

piled the walls up
lifted the draw bridge
locked the gates
now I’m sitting
with envy and fury
in my dank dungeon
and don’t dare
to hope
that anyone
would value me enough
to conquer me.

What made her write something like that? My heart constricted, feeling for her. She must have been really lonely. She must have felt like she had to turn the tables on people because otherwise she wouldn’t be valued. I wondered about the metaphors. Did she know how it was to live in a chateau? She wanted to be conquered, yet didn’t believe anyone would want her. I read what she wrote back then, translating the French parts in my head.

“Mick filed for divorce. After over 30 years he still can’t forgive me. Whatever I did wrong by making him a vampire is long past now. He drinks blood from freshies that Josef gives him, he likes to be strong and to bite and to rip the bad guys to shreds. What has he to be angry about? Whenever I manage to get him back for a week or a month, we make up and it’s great. He’s such a beautiful man, inside and out. I still love him. But he doesn’t want me, thinks I’m damaged and cruel, he doesn’t see me the way I am. He only sees the outer shell. Maybe I never dared to show him more. Maybe it was wrong to not be open from the start. I didn’t know he would feel betrayed. I didn’t know he would be repelled by me. Had I known – would I have done this differently? I don’t see how.”

I skimmed the next pages, looking for clues of her next steps. She talked about that Mick always wanted a family, and that she couldn’t give him that. What gave her the idea to give him a child to win him back? I shivered. How did she manage that? Some pages further she glowed with glee that she found the perfect little girl; the single mother working all day gave her lots of opportunities to see the blonde four year old in kindergarten and on the playground. The ever changing babysitters didn’t suspect a thing, and she easily made contact with the little girl.

“I did it. I got into her room in the middle of the night and took her to my house. She didn’t struggle much. She’ll get used to me, and once she’s awake and sees the beautiful room I made up for her, she will be content and happy. I left plenty of traces for him to find me. He’s a P.I. after all. I planted the idea of contacting Mick on the playground when I talked endlessly to the babysitter about how he found a lost pet of mine. They’ll remember his name, it’s not that common. The waiting makes me antsy; I need to hunt before the little girl wakes up. I’d give her a new name, but I’ll let Mick decide.”

I was appalled that she took a little girl from her mother, kidnapped her. There was something in the back of my mind but I didn’t draw the connection yet.

“Mick will come today, I know it. Henry came last night and told me that Mick has taken up the case and that he’s searching for me. I know he will go to my house first, but I enjoy the cat and mouse too much. I took the child to the old cabin where we had our wedding night. The old bed is still there, but the owner has left the whole place to decay, there’s not even electric light. Kind of like my marriage. I hope we can rekindle the flame. I took some oil lamps and tried to create a romantic atmosphere. I’m wearing the white flowing gown that he liked on me so much. Beth is playing with the dust on the chest of drawers.”

I let the book drop. It was Beth she had! Beth had told me about a scary woman taking her. I didn’t realize the time frame; I thought this diary was more recent. So Beth and Mick had known each other for over 20 years. No wonder there was this instant connection. The pieces fell into place.

Was this why he killed Coraline? I took the diary up again, but after a few bored musings from Coraline while they were waiting for Mick, the text stopped. There were a few empty pages, and then it started up again, in a slightly different hand. The writing was palsied, insecure and a lot smaller.

“Yes, I’m still alive. Barely. Mick killed me. He tried to, anyway. He said I’ve gone too far, kidnapping a child and hurting her. I never said anything about hurting or turning her, I wanted us to raise her together. I wanted to make her ours, give us a family. When he refused I was so angry. We had a fight. At some point he staked me and took the girl away. He threw an oil lamp into the furniture. Instantly the cabin caught fire. I managed to wiggle free from the stake, he had missed my heart, but I burned all over until I could get out.

Now Cynthia has taken me in, she brought me the diary and some things from the old house, closing it up for now. She’s very helpful, tending to my wounds, talking me through this. I feel so abandoned. It will take months for the burns to heal, even with all the young blood she brings me. I haven’t heard from Henry yet, he probably thinks I’m dead.”

I skipped the next few dozen pages, searching for a clue what she did then and where she lived. She wasn’t interested in providing details; her text was emotional and detached from reality. She talked endlessly about how hurt she was by Mick’s rejection, how despair consumed her about her inability to get through to him. Then she relocated to Chicago with her friend Cynthia. And then suddenly a plan took hold: coming back to L.A. as a human. Cynthia had managed to steal something on a trip to France, something they called “the compound”. She talked about it to be temporary, a few weeks or months depending on the dosage. She tried it out in Chicago, getting used to changing back (which sounded hard) and testing how far a dose got her.

Then she did something that made me realize again how ruthless she was. She took the identity of a young girl named Morgan Vincent. She was a photographer and worked for different news agencies. Coraline faked papers and contacts, achieved knowledge about her, and then killed her. A short week later Coraline moved to L.A. as Morgan Vincent, not taking Cynthia with her. The woman wasn’t happy about that. According to Coraline’s diary they had a big fight.

I checked the clock. 2.30 a.m. – I wasn’t sure how much time I had left until Mick and Coraline came back from the cemetery. I skipped to the end of the diary. There weren’t many pages left, I was lucky to have read as much as I had. At one point she excitedly wrote about her plans to burn down the Franklin hotel to get Mick’s attention, and that she got the mysterious Henry to help her.

Then there was another poem.

Points de lumière
isolés
infiltrés
sous la peau
pas encore chaude
bourgeonnent.

light points
unconnected
snuck
under the skin
not yet warm
budding

It was written after the night we were visiting the MacArthur Park. Had she begun the path back to life? Had she reflected on being human again, enjoying the sense of warm skin? Or was it just part of her plan of getting Mick back? I started to read on to see if this had anything to do with me, but then I heard the door. I dropped the book and tried to get everything back in order.

When I met her in the living room I saw that she was dirty, wet and dishevelled. She clung to my shoulders and sobbed, I was astonished and confused. Hugging her close I inched my way to the couch to get us in a comfortable place.

“What happened, Coraline?” I asked softly, kissing her temple.

She hiccupped, blotted her eyes with a tissue and started to explain. “We were at the cemetery, I had managed to distract the guards so that Mick could climb the fence, then I convinced them to let me in. I told them we wanted to take photographs; I had my press ID with me. I had told Henry that we wanted to look for his remains, I had joked about it. He waited for us there, and he attacked Mick. Mick fought back and almost killed Henry. I had to save him, so I pretended to be appalled and horrified by Mick’s vampire face. He let Henry go and ran after me. I suddenly realized that I was no match for him as a human, and that he would probably kill me again in his rage. Henry got away, never even checking if I was okay. Mick caught up with me, I was in a panic by then. Mick grabbed me and ripped my blouse. He wanted to see if I had the tattoo.”

“So he saw it then.”

“No, he didn’t. I had used make-up to hide it. I wanted him to see me like I was, I wanted him to look at me and talk to me, not see me as Coraline and hate me all over again.”

She sagged against me. “It was all in vain. He doesn’t want me anymore. He hates me, he ran away from me. He even hurt me when he attacked me. He doesn’t want Morgan, and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want Coraline.”

I didn’t know what to do. Reading her diary I had found a ruthless woman who was ready to use other people to get her way, totally unaffected by how her actions hurt others. I had also found a woman who was searching for love and acceptance; hurt herself by what had happened to her and what she had done.

Could I help her to get out of this circle of aggression and retreat? Maybe her weakened state at the moment would help her accept me and let me show her a new way.

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link to chapter 28:
viewtopic.php?f=75&t=6549
Last edited by francis on Sat Jun 12, 2010 1:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.
NocturneInCMoll
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Re: Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

Post by NocturneInCMoll »

Josh, Josh, Josh... :banghead:
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Lucy
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Re: Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

Post by Lucy »

I'm seeing her desperation to be loved. Her family really didn't treasure their only daughter!
Is josh strong enough to be her man?
Nnnnnoooooo...... She is fixated on MICK!

Thanks for the pm, francis!
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francis
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Re: Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

Post by francis »

NocturneInCMoll wrote:Josh, Josh, Josh... :banghead:
Don't hurt yourself, Nocturne! Thanks for reading.
Lucy wrote:I'm seeing her desperation to be loved. Her family really didn't treasure their only daughter!
Is josh strong enough to be her man?
Nnnnnoooooo...... She is fixated on MICK!

Thanks for the pm, francis!
Thank you, Lucy. And thank you for seeing Coraline as someone who might have a redeeming quality. Maybe Josh can be the one, if only he can break her addiction to Mick. And Beth has the same problem vice versa... :rose:
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AussieJo
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Re: Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

Post by AussieJo »

:rose: Very good chapter francis.
You can feel sympathy for Coraline. But while she's still feeling victimised, it's pretty well impossible to support her.
As it is with anybody in this frame of mind. You have to want to change.
Our family is going through this at the moment actually, with one of our siblings, so it struck a chord with me.
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Re: Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

Post by jen »

Sometimes, the scope of the disaster is just too much to manage. You may want to help--find some way to soothe the hurts and find a way to detoxify a wounded heart.

That is commendable. but in this case, first damage was done centuries ago, setting in motion a trail of hurts that can't be mended. Coraline is frozen in time. She neither ages, nor seemingly has the ability to learn from her mistakes. As far as learning experiences, she has had quite a few but just when it seems that she is progressing, it turns out to be a ruse.

Sad. :

Wonderful chapter, though!

Thanks!

:hearts: :flowers:
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Re: Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

Post by wollstonecraft61 »

Men shouldn't be allowed to walk around with those "things;" they can't think straight with them...
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Re: Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

Post by mitzie »

I do feel sympathy for Coraline, but she really seems incapable of wanting to change her ways. Josh should really get his head out of the clouds and get a reality check!!!! :yes: :gasp: :getclue: I love this story and can't wait to see what happens next... :yahoo: :yahoo: :clapping: :clapping: :hyper2: :hyper2: :Mickangel: :shrug: :dizzy: :jester: :nosee: :nails: :bash: :clapping: :clapping: :clapping: :thud: :thud: :thud: :thud: :notworthy: :hearts: :flowers:


mitzie :mooncat:
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francis
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Re: Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

Post by francis »

AussieJo wrote::rose: Very good chapter francis.
You can feel sympathy for Coraline. But while she's still feeling victimised, it's pretty well impossible to support her.
As it is with anybody in this frame of mind. You have to want to change.
Our family is going through this at the moment actually, with one of our siblings, so it struck a chord with me.
Thank you, Jo. I hope I got it right with this kind of people, if it struck a chord. Yes, it's only possible to change if you want the change. Josh won't have a chance to help her in any way if she doesn't want it.
jen wrote:Sometimes, the scope of the disaster is just too much to manage. You may want to help--find some way to soothe the hurts and find a way to detoxify a wounded heart.

That is commendable. but in this case, first damage was done centuries ago, setting in motion a trail of hurts that can't be mended. Coraline is frozen in time. She neither ages, nor seemingly has the ability to learn from her mistakes. As far as learning experiences, she has had quite a few but just when it seems that she is progressing, it turns out to be a ruse.

Sad. :

Wonderful chapter, though!

Thanks!

:hearts: :flowers:
Thank you, jen. I agree, Coraline didn't learn anything. The trauma of her youth never was relieved. But on the other hand, it's the same with Mick and still we want Beth to be able to help him get out of his angst. Maybe Cora can get out of her aggression too.
wollstonecraft61 wrote:Men shouldn't be allowed to walk around with those "things;" they can't think straight with them...
:rolling: :rolling: :rolling:
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francis
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Re: Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

Post by francis »

mitzie wrote:I do feel sympathy for Coraline, but she really seems incapable of wanting to change her ways. Josh should really get his head out of the clouds and get a reality check!!!! :yes: :gasp: :getclue: I love this story and can't wait to see what happens next... :yahoo: :yahoo: :clapping: :clapping: :hyper2: :hyper2: :Mickangel: :shrug: :dizzy: :jester: :nosee: :nails: :bash: :clapping: :clapping: :clapping: :thud: :thud: :thud: :thud: :notworthy: :hearts: :flowers:


mitzie :mooncat:
Thank you, mitzie, for reading and telling me you liked it. I guess if Josh got a clue the story wouldn't be AU any more. Let's see what happens next. :heart:
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Re: Twists of Fate Chapter 27 (5/27) PG-13

Post by cassysj »

You really show Coraline's desperate need to be loved. In her mind she was trying to give Mick everything he wanted but nothing was enough. To be honest I don't know what she could have done differently. I think Mick was too hurt at the "lies" she told him before marriage. Although after being a vampire for thirty years he should understand the need for dishonesty.
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