Consequences --PG-13

[librarian_7]

A/N This story follows directly on the heels of Comfort...and if you haven't read that, this might not make a lot of sense. I'm just sayin'.

Standard disclaimers. I don't own Josef. And I have permission from Eris for Freshie Eris's appearance in this story. Thanks, babe...I appreciate it!

Consequences

Lucky slipped out of Josef’s study with a quiet whisper of emerald satin, concentrating on closing the door without a sound, and turned to find Eris waiting, leaned against a nearby wall. She was frowning, and Lucky’s heart sank.

“What happened?” Eris asked. “Is he—is he all right?”

Lucky nodded, and something hard came into the other woman’s face.

“So, you’re a full-service freshie now?” The malice was unmistakable, and Lucky felt her jaw beginning to tremble. As if she hadn’t been through enough. She didn’t know how to respond, she didn’t know how to express what had happened to her in the night. There had been no time, yet, for her to begin to deal with it. “You were supposed to be helping him, not seducing him.”

That was too much. Just too much. Lucky raised her hand, wanting to strike out, and Eris braced for the blow, ready to answer it with a sneer. There was a frozen moment as they stared at each other, then Lucky lowered her hand. “You will never know,” she said thickly, “what last night cost me. Never.” Then what was left of her façade crumbled, and she fled to her room as the tears began.

Eris folded her arms and leaned back against the wall, thinking. A smart freshie, she knew, would leave it alone. A smart freshie would never consider confronting a vampire over his actions. She shrugged, mentally. Since when had she ever been a smart freshie? She pushed away from the wall and, shaking the bright cherry red hair out of her eyes, marched up to the study door and pushed it open without knocking.

Josef, wrapped in a darkly striped silk robe, was seated on the couch, a glass of red-tinged scotch in his hand, staring morosely out at the lightening morning landscape. The effects of his days of near-catatonic stupor were still evident in his unshaven face, gaunt with deprivation and haunted by events and actions that had overtaken him.

Eris came to stand before him, hands on her hips, refusing to be ignored. “What the hell were you thinking, you stupid vamp? What have you done to Lucky?” she demanded.

Josef seemed to snap into focus, the spark coming into his eyes. He gave the angry freshie a sharply intense look. “For one thing, I seem to have opened her up to being attacked and maligned in her own home.” He paused. “Chaos, of the many matters in heaven and earth that fall under your purview, my relations with Lucky are none of your business.”

“Not buying that. She’s my friend, you’re my—my—it’s hard to categorize it.”

“I’m your vampire. And I’m telling you to back off. Let it go.” His tone told her he would hear no more opposition.

She ignored that. Her face took on a stubborn cast. More stubborn, Josef reflected. He sighed inwardly. If she didn’t fill a hole in his spirit, somehow, if she hadn’t been so effective in keeping his interest through the sheer unpredictable force of her personality, if she hadn’t unexpectedly needed him so much, he’d possibly regret her disruptive presence in his house. Somehow, even now, he couldn’t. He’d noticed, in her gestures, a flash of white bandage, and it reminded him of the blood Lucky had brought him, that earnest and desperate mix of life his freshies had united to give him, when he was so in need. It was impossible for him to be angry, really, after that, with any of them.

Josef looked at her shrewdly. “What is it you want, Chaos? You want me to turn back time?”

“That would be a start.”

“It’s a little outside my powers, babe.”

Eris looked into his face, searching for reassurance. What she really wanted was for him to pull her into his lap and make her feel safe. It was weak, she thought, and she despised it in herself, but there it was. He knew what she wanted from him as well as she did, but he simply couldn’t do it. He was tired, with the bone-weariness of his long vigil, the emotional tumult of the past night. He’d come through it, like fording a flooded river to the peace of the far bank, but the trip had been exhausting. Suddenly, he yearned for the frozen oblivion of his cold bed. He stood, and pulled the tiny woman to him, feeling her arms creep around his waist as he embraced her. Lucky is closer to my height. The thought slipped into his mind before he realized it, shocking him with its naturalness.

“Chaos,” he said softly, “I can’t make promises about the future. And I’m not going to lie and say everything’s all right.”

“You lie all the time. And this once, it would be nice,” she muttered rebelliously. “What’d you do? Grow a conscience?”

“Slippery slope, Chaos,” he rejoined.

Eris sighed against him. “Stuff it, Josef,” she said. “I don’t know what happened, but you have to make it right.” She tilted her head up to look at him, eyes hot and fierce. “For once, can all that vamp bullshit, and be a man.”

“Some things aren’t that easy to change, doll.” He felt her hands ball into fists at his back. He was always curious about the amount of rage contained in such a small body.

“Try, Josef,” she said. “Try hard.”

&&

The knock on her door roused Lucky from her reverie. “Who’s there?” she called out.

“It’s me.”

Lucky had the most peculiar sensation, as though the world had taken a sudden random tilt. She felt a mixture of excitement and panic, even as she moved to the door, opening it to find the tall, heartstoppingly handsome vampire standing patiently outside. He looked better this evening, she thought, freshly shaven and rested. She felt a quick embarrassment at her own appearance. She’d been so—not devastated, not—she didn’t have a word for it—by the night before, she’d never changed or bathed, but just laid on her bed the whole day, alternately dozing through disturbing dreams and going over and over the night before in her mind.

About the last thing she expected was him, knocking on her door. He always called his freshies to come to him.

“Yes, of course, come in.” She put a hand to her disordered hair. She couldn’t do anything about her rumpled gown, or the smell of sweat and stale sex she knew he was getting from her body, but this, at least she could fix. “If you’ll excuse me just a second.”

He watched with some amusement as she hurried to her vanity and ran a brush through her fall of red hair. He could tell she was concerned, and wondered if she knew that really, the effect of that lingering perfume on her skin only made him want to throw her down on the bed and repeat last night’s indiscretions. “It’s all right, doll,” he said. “You look beautiful.”

“I look like I’ve just been—“ she started without thinking, then stopped as a delicious blush suffused her face and throat.

He shouldn’t be letting himself be aroused this way. He had better sense, better control. He found himself wanting, needing, to put his hands again on that milky skin of hers. It was oddly like the ache he often felt in his fangs before feeding, but even as much as he always enjoyed the feel of skin beneath his sensitive fingers, he didn’t remember having that strong urge to caress a particular human. Not for a long time now. He remembered the time he’d massaged her, all the times she’d been so close, so ready, and he’d refused the temptation.

“I wanted to see if you were all right.” Well, that was lame. 400 years and that was the best he could do? Then again, would “I wanted to see if you were still here,” or “I wanted to see if you’d decided to hate me” have been better?

“I’m fine. I—I appreciate your concern.” I made love to this vampire last night, and I’m talking to him like he’s the postman? Why?

“Lucky, I—I’m glad you’re all right.” I love awkward, but this is ludicrous. What she did last night saved me. So tell her that. Uh, yeah, then we’re back to the whole problem of the way what happened—happened.

Lucky frowned. “Are you all right, Josef? Is something wrong?” You’re here to tell me that what happened isn’t ever going to happen again, aren’t you? Or are you so scared you’re going to send me away?

“No, no. Everything is fine.” Everything is screwed to hell, and I still can’t stop myself from thinking that if I just took her in my arms, if I just kissed her, I’d feel like I did this morning, when she was naked in my bed.

“Oh. Good. I—I was worried.” He looks troubled. If I were just bold enough to go into his arms, perhaps I could make him at peace again. Who am I kidding? It’s Sarah he wants, only Sarah. Never me. Not that way.

“Lucky, I—“ Why is it so hard to find an excuse to touch her? It’s always been so easy with her. Why should it be different now?

His eyes fastened on the marks he’d left on her throat. He’d been too passionate, he thought, when he finally took her blood last night. The wounds were redder than they should be. He reached out, ran a finger gently over them. “You should take better care, sweetheart,” he said.

Her own hand rose involuntarily to her neck, brushing against his hand as she did. “Oh, yes,” she said. Does he feel the same electricity? The same tension?

His hand stilled beneath hers, pressed lightly to the proof of his possession, and she thought she felt a little of the stiffness fade from him. He felt the throb of her pulse jump, then steady to its familiar precious thrum.

Josef smiled at Lucky. “I need to go,” he said. I want to stay. And I want—

She nodded. “I’m sure you’ve got a ton of things to do.” And I wish you’d forget them and stay with me.

Neither moved, neither broke the contact. She was reassured, by his cool touch, and the complex weight of his gaze. He wasn’t sure what he was taking from her, exactly, but it felt a little like peace.

He turned away, with no word of farewell, but Lucky wasn’t looking for closure, any more than Josef was.

It was going to be all right.

[eris]

Poor Lucky and poor Josef not sure how to take up the steps of their dance again - not even sure if they should. I like that you didn't just leave the story at the end of Comfort because that ending was really only the beginning of a new chapter in their lives. Now things become even more complicated - not only will Mick know exactly what they were upto - but this has repercussions all the way upto the time that Lucky leaves Josef and beyond. He doesn't break his rules very often, so the times he does would be memorable.

(And if J doesn't snap out of it, Eris will just give him a swift kick in the... oh, who am I kidding?)

[AggieVamp]

*Jumping up & down with excitement* A new Lucky fic! This was GREAT! I loved all the undertones that were not being voiced between Lucky & Josef - and can't wait to see the OTHER freshies' reactions...if Chaos is any indication - it ought to be VERRY interesting..

Karen

[maynard21]

Beautiful follow up to Comfort! Like some of the other readers, I was concerned about Lucky's willingness to so completely submit to Josef to the point of being someone else for him, even though I realize she was just trying to help him through whatever emotional tornado he was riding. I believe Lucky is a strong women and will come through this, but as a psychologist I always cringe when I see such willing submission. It's good to see Josef off his stride and out of snark...I'm anxious to see how their dance continues. And it's good to see the women watching out for each other, even when it's against Josef.
Marsha

[francis]

Oh no. Now the full-fledged contempt of another freshie (maybe jealousy?), after what she went through emotionally. But then she says something that makes Eris understand. And she confronts Josef – I love her. She never is one to keep her mouth shut when she sees others wronged, huh?
I so love that Josef cannot be angry at her. She is disruptive, and overstepping bounds, but that’s exactly what makes her unique.

“You lie all the time. And this once, it would be nice,” she muttered rebelliously. “What’d you do? Grow a conscience?”

That’s fabulous. It shows her concern, her understanding of what Josef is, and her puzzlement with what happened.

I can feel the emotional exhaustion of Josef, Lucky, and Eris, ooze out of the pages. This is draining while reading it. Soooo great skill.
And I thought you had only Lucky’s and Josef’s character down. I was wrong. You understand Eris as well.

He shouldn’t be letting himself be aroused this way. He had better sense, better control. He found himself wanting, needing, to put his hands again on that milky skin of hers. It was oddly like the ache he often felt in his fangs before feeding, but even as much as he always enjoyed the feel of skin beneath his sensitive fingers, he didn’t remember having that strong urge to caress a particular human.

Josef has lost his boundaries. He trespasses into Lucky’s room. He remembers what it feels like to love, the need almost like a hunger.

I love their conversation that leaves 80% of the truth out. And their thoughts show that Lucky thinks the wrong thing. And he isn’t really ready to take another step, as it’s something he never saw even coming. They have a long way to go. They can’t go back, and they both know it.

I love this story. It’s almost tender how you write them, as if you were stepping lightly with their emotions, to not hurt them any further. Thank you.
(If I were to recast Moonlight, I would want Lucky in Simone’s place. She would deal much better with the police, and she would have real chemistry with Josef.)

[moonlight_vixen]

Ever since reading "Comfort," I had wondered what the next steps were going to be between Lucky and Josef, and how their relationship was going to evolve from this point forward. It's quite obvious they cannot step backwards, and moving forward is no doubt going to be extremely difficult for the two of them in different ways. A million different scenarios ran through my head thinking about what was coming next. I think you captured the perfect one

Eris certainly didn't hold back, and nothing less should be expected from her. Of any of the girls to come forward and give Josef a piece of her mind, it's her. Hands down.

The scene between Josef and Lucky was such a "push and pull," as I like to say. It's so hard to imagine the two of them ever being at a loss for words around each other but this scene proved me wrong!

Josef smiled at Lucky. “I need to go,” he said. I want to stay. And I want—

She nodded. “I’m sure you’ve got a ton of things to do.” And I wish you’d forget them and stay with me.

I felt like standing up and shouting at them "Just say it! Say it out loud!"

Neither moved, neither broke the contact. She was reassured, by his cool touch, and the complex weight of his gaze. He wasn’t sure what he was taking from her, exactly, but it felt a little like peace.

He turned away, with no word of farewell, but Lucky wasn’t looking for closure, any more than Josef was.

It was going to be all right.

I think this is the perfect ending.

Brilliant work, Lucky!!

[jenstc2003]

This is such a fitting continuation... you knew they'd have a few things to work through, and it will take a lot of time. I think this is a great start to that healing. Loved Eris' reaction- if any of the girls would react, it would be her. And taking Lucky's side against J once she noticed that there was something wrong- perfect!

[ari]

Angsty and yet not... there's hope there. There's love eventhough he won't admit to it, not really... I just wish he'd let go of that oh so precious self control.. just for her..

Loved it sweetie!

[cassysj]

I'm glad you picked up from where you left off. I also loved Eris's reaction. I do feel for both of them. Interesting to see how life will continue in the Kostan Casa.

[one.zebra]

Very touching..very interesting..I agree with the others, there's no going back...must find a 'new normal'

/holds up empty bowl, just licked clean/ 'May I please have some more?'..wait, missed a spot../lick/

[nutmegger911]

And you wanted to smack Mick!?! Ooh, I am sooo annoyed with Josef right now.

Surely, it had to be awkward; and for once maybe Josef didn't so much like awkward. That part you pegged. But ooh, the holding back the truth.

Same holds true for Lucky. If she thinks holding back the truth will make it all right, the girl is kidding herself.

These two have a lot to work out. Better get writing. (Please)

[librarian_7]

I just got through reading all your comments, again...I want you to know I really treasure all of them. To know that I've created something that would garner such reactions....it's a amazing feeling.

Got a question for all you careful readers...that last line, that last thought--whose was it?

Just curious. I know what I meant, but I'd like to hear how you read it.

Lucky

[eris]

I just got through reading all your comments, again...I want you to know I really treasure all of them. To know that I've created something that would garner such reactions....it's a amazing feeling.

Got a question for all you careful readers...that last line, that last thought--whose was it?

Just curious. I know what I meant, but I'd like to hear how you read it.

Lucky

Shared thought by both of them.

[allegrita]

First, I agree with Eris. The last line is shared by both of them.

Second-- Eris, you go, girl! Give him hell. He needs a little hell. I'm glad Eris figured it out, though, because I was gonna have to smack her, and frankly, she scares the *bleep* out of me. So I'm glad I didn't have to.

Third...
This is a wonderfully difficult and emotionally deep story. Josef is reminded of what Mick meant when he tried to explain why vamps and humans shouldn't have relationships. Difficult, dangerous, and complicated for both of them.

Josef did something amazing when he went to Lucky's room. I'm not sure it's sunk in for her quite yet, but maybe on reflection she'll realize how completely he went against his rules, and what that means.

By the end of the scene in Lucky's room, they have somehow come to an understanding of sorts. Maybe they just know each other so well that they can read each other's thoughts/emotions to some extent. For whatever reason, the subtext has sunk in a little...and they are both comforted. It's not over by any means, but the next phase has definitely begun.

I'm glad you wrote this follow-on, Lucky.

[tucutecats]

fabulous follow up,it was so charged with emotion, she loves him and knows she can never really have a future with Joseph.
i think the last line was both Lucky and J. you are a wonderful story teller, I look forward to all your future work. Keeping Moonlight alive, that's what it's all about.