As always, the characters aren't mine and no copyright infringement is intended. I just enjoy playing with them.
For you, SG6169, I hope you enjoy it.
No Regrets – Part 2
‘Forgive me.’
Driving home in the early morning hours, Beth couldn’t silence the echo of Mick’s plea. She shivered at the memory of his touch, his cool lips brushing the twin piercings on her wrist. Whether his kiss was simply the professed act of contrition or something more, Beth didn’t know and wasn’t sure she wanted to. Yet the haunted look in the vampire’s eyes is what troubled her most.
So guilt-ridden, so sad, so…. lonely? There was more to Mick’s pain than he let on, but what that was, Beth could only guess. From the moment they’d met, she’d felt an affinity towards the brooding PI, finding excuses to be in his company. After nearly losing him not once, but twice in the last 24 hours, the need to be with him tonight had been overwhelming. Once together, she sensed his own need, yet Mick seemed reluctant, perhaps even afraid to be near her, let alone feel her touch. Yet he was a vampire, an immortal. How could she possibly hurt him?
Vampire.
A few weeks ago, Beth would have scoffed at the notion that vampires existed anywhere but in fiction or her editor’s overactive imagination. Now that she’d gotten to know Mick, the Goth pretenders that lurked in LA’s shadowy clubs or that fawned over that womanizing sleaze, Christian Ellis, seemed more pathetic than ever. They had no idea what a real vampire was like. Then again, did she?
‘There’s a few hundred of us here in LA.’
That was something Beth still couldn’t comprehend. How could so many hide in plain sight so well? Were they all like Mick, believing themselves monsters and yearning for their lost humanity? Somehow, she didn’t think so as Pollock had reveled in his brief, but murderous walk on the wild side. Mick’s wife hadn’t seemed to mind her vampiric condition either, else why turn the man she loved? Beth sighed, regretting she would never meet this mysterious ex. Prying or not, she was curious about the kind of woman Mick St. John had loved enough to marry.
Their conversation tonight had at least reassured Beth that she wasn’t losing her mind. The subtle connection she felt with Mick after their time in the desert had begun to worry her. Finding out the connection was real, the result of sharing her blood with him, was comforting. Finding out it would soon fade was not; that subtle, unique intimacy was something Beth didn’t want to lose.
But why is it so important to me? What is it about Mick that draws me to him ? OK, I admit the man looks like a Greek god and is exciting to be around, but there’s something else, something I can’t quite put my finger on…..
With all these questions swirling in Beth’s mind, she nearly ran a red light, stopping only just in time. Waiting for the light to change, she realized Mick was the only one who could help answer them, but that she’d have to take it slowly. The first time she’d tried to satisfy her curiosity, she’d gone all Buzzwire on him, firing questions at Mick he clearly wasn’t ready to answer, resulting in nothing more than an invitation to leave. Eventually, Mick had shared what were clearly painful memories, but more importantly, the admission that he trusted her.
In hindsight, Beth wondered how she could have been so insensitive; she had her own painful memories to contend with. It was maddening, really; only in dreams would they show themselves, fading rapidly once she awoke. Beth hadn’t dreamt about her abduction in years and found it disconcerting that the nightmares returned after she’d met Mick. Even more troubling was that he was now a part of them. Good thing her boyfriend was so understanding.
Beth smiled. Leave it to Josh to explain that recent traumatizing events had re-awakened memories of her childhood abduction. She had to admit this made sense; Mick’s near destruction at Lee Jay’s hands had caused her to do something she’d never done before – kill another human being. The shock of that experience was small compared to that of learning Mick’s dark secret. No wonder the nightmares had returned.
Her smile faded recalling Josh’s disapproval of her growing friendship with the PI. She’d tried to allay his fears, telling him that the time she spent with Mick was work related, nothing more. Maybe Josh was just concerned about the PI’s influence on her, as Beth seemed more reckless than ever in his company. Then again, maybe Josh saw something in Mick that he didn’t see in himself and thought himself diminished in his girlfriend’s eyes.
A revving engine startled Beth back to the present. A young man in a red Ferrari had pulled alongside her, clearly impatient for the light to change. The way he had his arm wrapped around a stunning young woman, his fingers stroking her arm, made it clear what was on his mind. When the young man glanced at Beth, he did a double-take, then smiled wickedly before speeding away.
Jerk!
Arriving home, Beth parked, then dragged herself up the building’s stairs. Only a little while ago she’d been too wired to sleep, but the day’s events had finally caught up with her, leaving her physically and emotionally exhausted. Right now, she wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed, close her eyes and hope for a dreamless night. Tired as she was, she failed to notice the sliver of light at the base of her apartment door.
As the door opened, her surprise visitor stopped in mid pace, his fist clenched around a small object. Beth hoped she didn’t look as guilty as she suddenly felt.
“Josh! I …I thought you went home.”
“I did.” The ADA’s voice was even, his face expressionless, but she could sense his anger. Opening his hand, Josh waved his cell phone at her. “Once I got there, I realized I’d left my phone on the nightstand and came back to get it. Imagine my surprise when I found you weren’t in bed where I’d left you. Then I find your car gone…..”
Beth felt her face go hot. “After you left, I …I couldn’t go back to sleep, so I went for a drive.”
All pretense of calm evaporated. “I’ve been calling you for almost an hour, Beth. You didn’t pick up. I was worried sick, not knowing where you were.” Josh approached her, his eyes saying what he dared not voice.
Or who you were with.
“I’m sorry, I…I must have turned my phone off. The last couple of days have just been too much. I needed to get out and clear my head.”
“And just where do you go at two in the morning to clear your head?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Beth’s anger flared at the insinuation.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“This isn’t a court room, Josh. If it’s any of your business, I went over to see how Mick was feeling.”
“Of course. The mysterious, brooding PI buddy of yours. And just how is Mr. Never-a-Dull-Moment doing?”
Beth knew she had to calm this conversation down; she’d rarely seen Josh so pissed. “Pretty well, actually. He seems to have recovered from his sun poisoning once he got some …fluids in his system. He was really dehydrated and feverish when I found him.”
Josh gave a derisive snort. “Guess your friend isn’t so smart after all.” At Beth’s quizzical expression, he continued. “Come on, who the hell goes wandering around in a desert clothed head to foot in black?
“One who was doing his damnedest to keep a young woman and her unborn child from being murdered. Something you and your people couldn’t do.”
An angry retort formed, then died on Josh’s lips, knowing Beth was right. After a few moments of uneasy silence, he reached out to her. “Truce?”
Beth nodded, but didn’t take his hand.
Josh sighed. “You’re right. The last couple of days have been hell. A known killer almost walked. People I worked with, friends, were killed. All because someone we knew and trusted betrayed us.”
“Then you know how I felt when I thought Mick and Leni were dead.”
“Not really. You’d never met Leni and you’ve only known Mick for a few weeks. I knew Colden and Nagawa. It’s just not the same.”
“You’re right, it’s not. Mick saved my life. Can you say the same?”
Josh winced, feeling as if he’d just been slapped. “No. I guess I can’t.”
Seeing how she’d hurt him, Beth reached out and took Josh’s hand in hers. “Listen. We’re both tired and stressed and talking now is only making things worse. We need to get some sleep.”
Alone.
A sad smile crossed the ADA’s face, understanding the unvoiced request to leave. “Yeah, you’re right. It’s late enough that I’d better go home, seeing as how I’ve got to be in court in a few hours.”
“I’m sorry, Josh. I didn’t mean to worry you …”
“I know. Maybe I’m being overprotective, but there’s something about Mick that bugs me. That guy’s bad news, Beth. You need to get away from him. Trust me.”
“No. You ….you just don’t understand him.”
“And you do?”
An awkward silence again ensued, each feeling that something had just happened, something neither fully understood. Josh brushed Beth’s cheek with a kiss, hoping he only imagined her slight flinch. Without another word, he left.
It wasn’t long before Beth tumbled into bed and into a deep sleep. Once again, bits and pieces of her childhood memories swirled in her subconscious mind, teasing those buried deeper to emerge.
The scary lady in white, her hands cold against the child Beth’s skin, her vise-like grip holding her close.
A man, his face…so familiar, his eyes, so sad….
‘I won’t let you do this…’
Screams….blood….then fire….everywhere fire….but the man holds her close, protecting her against the flames, his strong hands cold against her skin…..
His cool lips kissing the wound he inflicted…..
With the morning sun high in the sky and the fragments of her dreams long gone, Beth lay in bed, hugging a pillow close. There was something new in her dreams, something important, but she just couldn’t quite put all the pieces together. All she knew was that for whatever reason, Mick seemed a permanent part of them now.
Later, a strong cup of coffee in hand, Beth stood on her bedroom balcony, reflecting on the night’s events. Even though she’d previously denied it, her relationship with Josh had changed. What had once been fun and exciting had become predictable, at times, stifling, and she found herself aching for something more, something she feared Josh would never be able to give her.
Peeling away the bandage on her wrist, Beth ran her finger near the now healing wounds, hearing Mick’s voice as she did so.
‘You gave yourself freely to save me. You’re a part of me now, and I’m sorry. I don’t want to cause any trouble between you and Josh. In time, when your blood is no longer in me, the connection you feel with me will fade.’
No, it wouldn’t. Not if she could help it. It was time for Beth to follow her own advice; she needn’t defend her friendship with Mick to Josh or to anyone else. Without fully comprehending why, Beth knew that if she didn’t try to understand her connection with Mick, she’d regret it for the rest of her life.
Well, that is while you're not speculating or taking care of countdown clocks... 
...
, but she'll always find time to speculate